Confused - Love and Romance

[Bobbye_L._Webb]

Okay I just started seeing this girl and I really like her, however, though she says she does not want to change me there are little hints here and there that suggest otherwise. She knows that in the summer my friends and I get together at our friends house and swim and get well...slightly intoxicated, lol. But nobody fights or acts a fool, it's all in good fun. She came to visit and asked me at one point did I want another beer, I said sure so off she went to get my beer. Not being a drinker herself she is fine just having fun with her water but as soon as we left the party she says you're drunk, but I was not and then she says I'm sweating because I was drunk. I was sweating because it's 100 freaking degrees out! She was also a little upset because I took a hit off one cigarette and she knows I have smoked forever and have only recently stopped and when one is drinking and trying to quit smoking, it's when you're drinking you crave it more. She says stop using that as an excuse. Tell me people, is this woman trying to change me or just make me crazy?

[Renee_Wiseman]

have you talked to here ab this?? whn u do drink an your trying to quit smoking it does make u wanna smoke it honestly is not an excuse..been there done that an have friends the same way.... is she against people who drink??well you dont sweat if your drunk wow.. sounds to me she is trying to do both.....i would talk to her ab this n ask her why is she saying things like that..take her out to lunch or make her lunch n just ask her why she acted like that....there nothing wrong with someone having fun an having a few drinks..does she always act like that whn you are around your friends?? if so she is jelly of the fact your having fun..js.. let me no what goes on... renee

[Bobbye_L._Webb]

Thanks Renee and Debbie

We have had this discussion long before she even met my friends. She says she does not care if I drink as long as I can handle myself. She also says she doesn't judge people, well I can't tell lol. She is just a goodie two shoes which is fine, but I feel like she wants to make me a version of her and it aint gonna happen. Not now and not ever. She tells me shes in this for the long haul, but I can't be the only one expected to change, she needs to loosen the hell up and I've already told her I'm not changing. I know that drinking is no excuse for smoking but I can't help my cravings and she needs to understand that is all I'm saying.

[Renee_Wiseman]

your welcome..i wouldnt let her change you you are who you are an if she cant accept that than maybe she isnt for you&gt. im just saying straight facts.. she must be willing to change as well its only fair for the both of you it take 2 to have a good relationship you cant do the whole 100%your self...

[Bobbye_L._Webb]

Kinda what I was thinking Renee. Of course it is a new relationship so I suppose we will have to iron out all the kinks, at least I hope so.

[Sandy_Faiad]

if she is a les femme she is trying both, excuse me but it is the truth!
i know what i'm going to get. jeje

[Bobbye_L._Webb]

Well she is definitely femme and since I've not dated femmes before perhaps it will be a learning experience if nothing else.

[Sandy_Faiad]

jjejejejeee you got it my friend! tell me about it

[Bobbye_L._Webb]

Lol, not sure what I've gotten myself into. Freaking women!

[Sandy_Faiad]

with women nobody knows, i woudl not call them (us)( we are women too)
"freaking women" but i know for sure that we are complicated.
my god tell me about it! its frustrated but that is the live we live.
so i don't complian anymore if any of them is not good for me.
i just keep on trucking" = next darling