Questions? - Love and Romance

[Je****]

Do you think you should ask a new partiner about their past relationships?
What went wrong and why/

[Sa****]

ugh! i never know how to answer those questions. sometimes i just wanna say FUBAR! because it takes two to make and break a couple. there are two sides to every story and you're only hearing one side of the story. so what difference does it make really? and to top it off..aren't you setting yourself up for a prejudice on your new relationship? i've been with women who it just didn't work out between us. we wanted different lives. she wanted to spend every day spending my money in the bar. and i wanted her to get a real job and quit using me. and then i've had a relationship that was wonderful and every girl's dream. but i couldn't hack it for some reason. guess it wasn't mine. but if i went into detail about it...you'd see me as an evil bitch.
like i said you're usually not getting the full truth anyway. most of the time when you get the old relationship stories that person is telling it from their perspective as a victim or "the one" who got hurt in the relationship and their ex is the bitch.
so, what's the point?

[Teri_Baker]

Maybe it is best to try to judge the person you are dating by what you see as you date them.That is what dating is all about... getting to know one another and learning about what kind of person they are by what they do and say..Some people you can read a little better than others and see that they are not in to games and are up front and honest, but it takes time to figure out the long haul, whether they have integrity.We all make mistakes in our past, it is how we learn, so you can't go all the way back to a persons very beginning and expect perfection. You fall a whole lot in life and dust yourself off and be a better person then. At least, most of us do. I hope.How can you trust otherwise? I have been scammed a lot on this site but I still believe true love is out there.
Hugs,
Teri
.

[sa****]

i think not i beleve it just didnt work out. y bother so when an argumnt start u can hear, i c y or u miss her. sometimes things just dont work out. i see it as i get the chance to show this woman that i know how to treat a lady and in my world shes a princess and when she leaves best beleve she'll know what it's like to be treated with true respect and feel like a princess. i say leave it in the past becaz whatever happened u get the chance to make her happy

[Sa****]

I would want to know but not ask. I would wait for her to tell me when she is ready to talk about it . I feel if she wants to speak about her past relationship and what went wrong its because she wants me to know just in case our relationship goes any further she doesn't want me to do the same or treat her in that same way ... on the other hand I rather be dating her so it can be more about us. Better for me to get to know her. What she likes and don't like and by me treating her right. By her still wanting to date me I would already know what went wrong ... ..........................................................And at the same you all have a good point ...

[Ju****]

@jeri. My partner and I do talk about about our past partners... I like knowing what she liked and did not and what worked and did not. We are both trying to have as much information as we can gain from each other to make our relationship as strong as we can and also avoid the pitfalls we can stay clear.

I think we are motivated by the fact we both ended up investing 15 years of our life in a deadened relationship with our exes who's mission was to *** and keep us there trapped.

As a side benefit, I know a lot about what tunes her on and makes her feel good....

[Je****]

@June...Love your comment! Talking about the past can be good or bad. I can see both sides. On the one hand you find out what makes them happy in a relationship and on the other hand you can hear about alot of bad things...Things you may do that a past lover has that they didn't like. I see both sides. I just wondered what other people thought...