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Come to me or Stay where you are ...... - Love and Romance

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Posted

I have been with my girl for about sixteen yrs now and with in the time we were broken up I have moved a year later... we got back together but through the whole time we been on and off... fighting and arguing constantly but the love wouldn't let us slip away ... now just a few days ago I broke up with her and my heart is tilted and its spilling her out slowly but i don't wan that i want to love her I want to be with her but her jealous keeps me from showing her how much she means to me ...when I am with her we are happy and the sex is great i want her through the whole night,day,evening it do not matter... she wants the same ....I just wish I knew what was the problem to why she always think I am out there fucking someone else and this is all the time and the messed up thing about it I am not ...she is the only one and has been... it just makes me want to be with others but i don't ...but now she wants to move out here with me and she wants to give us another try and she said that she will change and that i will see how good she would be and that if she move out here and will be close to me that i will notice the change in her ....Now should i trust that and if she move out here because i said I'll give it a shot and see if she would change and she does the same things and acts the same way where would that leave me ...I think she would blame that she moved out here for me and make me feel I have to be with her because she moved out here to be with me I don't have a clue what to do ....but at the same time I want that single life now and just have fun... from here the relationship thing has done it i feel i am through... I just don't want to be told that i am fucking someone every day of my life or that because my sex is good i make you crazy and that i made you that way ....I just know i love her and want to be with her I am just scared of the out come of it all that's it .....


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Posted

You have to do what's right for you, if you are happy being single, then she should not move out, she won't change, if you do take her back, tell her only under certain conditions, therapy, and those conditions must be met before you can start over, my questions are can you trust her and are you better off with her or without her!?


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Jodie_Hendricks
Posted

Salena,
That's alot to think about and process.You know you didn't cheat on her,so why does she keep thinking that you did, maybe it's because she is the one who cheated, and she's feeling guilty so she's laying a guilt trip on you by accusing you of cheating. Sex is an important part of any relationship, but she keeps on accusing you of cheating, then when things don't go her way she sucks you into her guilt. You say you enjoy being single, then you need to tell her to stay where she is, cause your done your tired of all the crap. Take it from one who knows, I've been single for 5 yrs now, prior to that I was in a 26 yr relationship that I ended because my ex was cheating on me with our son's Godfather. I never knew about it till after I went to stay with my uncle because he's ill. Maybe this is God's way of telling you, He has a better person for you, you never know. So if you like being single then you should stay single, you have given her enough chances, It's time to move on.


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Ney_Ney
Posted

I agree 100% with Jodie it sounds to me you need to move on I don't see her changing she is who she is your ex wont change her ways if she would have changed her ways she would have done it a long time ago.........


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Posted

the trust issue is a huge part in a relationship. If she doesnt trust you, and you havent cheated, then she has trust issues she needs to resolve or no relationship with her will ever work out. At the same time, I also dont think flirting with others in a relationship is healthy,just in case you are doing it. Not accusing. Some pple say they can act as they want, but it does not build trust or does a person treat the relationship with honor or themselves.She needs some therapy to get over this or you'll go crazy with guilt for no reason. Hugs.


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sandifer
Posted

i don't think her moving is good ideal a visit for 2 weeks or so once in awhile and maybe vacationing together, but moving back in not cool. it's great to stay in touch and visit once in awhile but if u r not sure DON'T that space thing very important if u believe within ur heart that it's over than move on and again focus on U but at the end u must follow ur heart,


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Posted

@ Marianne...IDK if i can trust her she always told me that she would change but that did not happen an if it did only in the begging ...then it went right back to the way it was ...Now she saying that if she moves out here that she would show me that it would be different and the reason why she has been acting that way is because she Love's me that much and she is afraid that i will leave her for someone else ... @ JODIE ....I don't believe that she has cheated on me in these past yrs but in the begging of our relationship something did happen and I have forgiven her and we have moved on with our relationship since then we been stuck like glue and when we are not we are on the phone and on skype or oovoo ...so i don't see that she would have time for that and you could be right about the guilt trip since she did cheat on me once before she maybe still on thinking that i am doing the same...... @TERI...yes I am a flirt and that has been an issue for her and I just cant help it but most of the time when i am not flirting she thinks i am its just the way my eyes are everyone always think that I am flirting but I really don't some times it looks that way honestly... @EVETTE....she does come to visit for two weeks all the time and i go out to visit some times but most its her coming out here to me and to follow my heart then that would mean I would have to move to her ....lol... But thanks to everyone of you guys for you opinions and advice....


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