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Lesbian Love versus Lesbian Lust - Get HAPPY

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Both lust and love have merit, but it’s best to understand the difference before you get hurt, or worse, you break that sweet woman’s heart. Although lust and love are often indistinguishable to the naked eye, they are quite different indeed, particularly as they relate to the inherent implied promises each evokes. It’s the implication of each of these all-consuming conditions that possesses the power to crush a lesbian’s heart. So, be mindful of the words you choose when you’re in her arms. Don’t say, “I love you” if you don’t mean it. Resist the urge to please her by whispering these words in her ear if your only aim is to keep her in your bed. Shame on you if you stoop so low.

In the beginning, lust, unlike love, is more about the fulfillment of selfish needs. Before you’ve crossed that arbitrary, invisible line in the sand over into love, lust will take you on a narcissistic romp, always focused on your next physical high. Maybe there’s a reason that the words slut and lust are comprised of the same four letters.

Once you say, “I love you,” most lesbians take that as a commitment. Even though you only said those three, small words, you have implied that you will be monogamous, move in with her, dry her tears, marry her, take care of her when she’s sick and all the other “til death do us part” duties. So be careful!

There are people who believe in love at first sight. I am not one of them. To be fair, however, I do believe in lust at first sight, as I have experienced this glorious blissful state on many occasions. For me, lust morphs into love about half the time. And the other half of those relationships end within a few weeks or months, as the fire of desire that sizzled at first, quickly dies down, with nothing left afterwards but some good memories and tall tales.

Lust is primarily a chemical reaction. Although there is a mental component to lust, lust is more about friction, while love is more about spiritual connection. Clearly, lust has a mental component as well, but attraction rules the game, not the stronger connections of understanding, commitment and empathy. For me, lust is a craving of that person’s touch. Sometimes, it is the way she walks, or the lilt of her voice, or simply the way she looks at me that acts as kindling to ignite the flame. So, although lust is superficial at best, it is often fueled by mental attraction as well as physical attraction.

Maybe that’s the reason so many lesbians rush to utter those three special words, “I love you.” They really believe that they do love her, attributing their ability to talk with their lady love easily and about anything as a mental joining, and therefore assigning their attraction to a higher status than lust, which often conjures up only physical attraction in many people’s minds.

Here’s a simple test you can use to decide whether it is lust or love. Remember this disclaimer. Lust can turn into love, so although it may be lust today, it could change into love given enough time. So don’t fret if your results say you’re in lust. There are many characteristics that define both lust and love. If you can answer yes to 7 out of the 10 points under the love column, you are in love. If you answer yes to 7 out of the 10 points under the lust column, you are definitely being controlled by lust, but remember, you could be headed quickly toward love, as lust is often a prerequisite for love. If you answer yes to 7 out of 10 points under both categories of lust and love, BRAVO. You are very lucky and should count your blessings!

10 Defining Characteristics of Lust

1. All you can think about is her.

2. You are constantly worrying and planning for your next sexual encounter.

3. You replay your last sexual interlude over and over again in your mind.

4. You cancel plans with your friends to be with her.

5. You buy sexy lingerie and matching bras and panties for your dates.

6. You purchase perfume.

7. You think about her body parts, her legs, her lips, her smile, her breasts; memorizing every dimple, freckle and curve.

8. You experiment sexually, leaving your comfort zone in an effort to achieve the highest levels of sexual pleasure.

9. You forget to check your email and Facebook page daily.

10. You resent sharing her with others as you hunger to have her all to yourself.

10 Defining Characteristics of Love

1. You imagine growing old together and want to introduce her to your friends.

2. You enjoy simple things like going to the movies, enjoying dinner at a restaurant, or taking a walk.

3. You admire how sweet and kind she is to you and others.

4. You can’t imagine life without her and see her in your future, by your side.

5. You notice other women, but you no longer crave them.

6. You strive to be a better person yourself, wanting to please her, to deserve her.

7. You enjoy making love and holding her afterward, focusing more on her pleasure than on your own.

8. You stand by her when life gets tough and are happy to do it for funerals, job loss, sickness and other challenges.

9. You compromise to please her even when it hurts to do it.

10. You take the high road during arguments, resisting the urge to hurt her with biting remarks.


Great job...Very insightful take on love n lust. Applicable to most of us I think.

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