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How is this far? - The Gay Christian Network

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I was at a Elim church for a good 23 years so from birth till last year when I moved to be with family.

During that time I helped out with the youth group, preparing for meetings and events, Did the teas and coffees after sermons and covered shifts (If I didn't I got an ear full about how I never cover others when I did), made media videos and banners, you name it I would help.

It wasn't all happy either though. I was told if a man lusted after another he has committed adultery. Two men, one married, lusted after me and the other also lusted after my 10 year old niece. The church turned a blind eye to this and blamed it on me. Even though I stay covered up, I don't show my legs or arms and my t-shirts go upto my neck, they still think I led them on with the clothes I wear.

When I fell pregnant they made it look like I had to appoligise to the church instead of God.

Through humilation I stood by them. When my friend was forced to leave the church because she left her abusive husband I stayed. Yet now I have moved away they don't keep in contact with me. One of my friends hates me because I carried a child. She has two kids and had a miscarriage so now if your not married and have a kid she will leave you and others followed that example.

So my question is why do churches have to be like this?

Where is the love, acceptance, tolerance, patients, kindness, councel without prejudice and above all where is God?

I don't mean God as in he doesn't exist I mean where is the God love that these people claim to have. My pastor almost had a heart attack when I told her I was going to the pub with my male friend with his boyfriend.

Am bi and my friend thinks its a phase......as if.



Life isn't fair, and most people are hypocrites including institutions called churches are included in that.

I think that is one of the very many reasons Jesus had Judas as one of his disciples, to help us to know and understand what the Psalmist meant when he wrote this for us:

Psalm 62 &gt&gt
New International Version 1984

Psalm 62

For the director of music. For Jeduthun. A psalm of David.

1My soul finds rest in God alone;

my salvation comes from him.

2He alone is my rock and my salvation;

he is my fortress, I will never be shaken.

3How long will you assault a man?

Would all of you throw him down—

this leaning wall, this tottering fence?

4They fully intend to topple him

from his lofty place;

they take delight in lies.

With their mouths they bless,

but in their hearts they curse. Selah

5Find rest, O my soul, in God alone;

my hope comes from him.

6He alone is my rock and my salvation;

he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.

7My salvation and my honor depend on Goda;

he is my mighty rock, my refuge.

8Trust in him at all times, O people;

pour out your hearts to him,

for God is our refuge. Selah

9Lowborn men are but a breath,

the highborn are but a lie;

if weighed on a balance, they are nothing;

together they are only a breath.

10Do not trust in extortion

or take pride in stolen goods;

though your riches increase,

do not set your heart on them.

11One thing God has spoken,

two things have I heard:

that you, O God, are strong,

12and that you, O Lord, are loving.

Surely you will reward each person

according to what he has done.

a 7 Or / God Most High is my salvation and my honor
Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by Biblica.
Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.
See detailed copyright information.


Thanks, am just really angry at the thought of hard work for others in a relationship and they forget me.


LOL! I totally understand, Our Lord Jesus has the same probelm, so you are in good company!++++++++++++++++


I can see


Hi Liz, I had a similar problem. I always used to go to church but really was never accepted, only marginalised. When I finally left, no one contacted me- just the youth pastor- no one else did. I did not hide my identity- I am transgender but I left as I was never allowed to be a part of it. Things changed for me when I read a book called "The Ragamuffin Gospel" by Brennan Manning- it changed my life. He really understands all about grace. Here are some quotes from the book.
"The bending of the mind by the powers of this world has twisted the gospel of grace into religious bondage and distorted the image of God into an eternal, small-minded bookkeeper. The Christian community resembles a Wall Street exchange of works wherein the elite are honored and the ordinary ignored. Love is stifled, freedom shackled, and self-righteousness fastened. The institutional church has become a wounder of the healers rather than a healer of the wounded. Put bluntly, the American church today accepts grace in theory but denies it in practice. We say we believe that the fundamental structure of reality is grace, not works- but our lives refute our faith. By and large, the gospel of grace is neither proclaimed, understood, nor lived. Too many Christians are living in the house of fear and not in the house of love".

and : "Something is radically wrong when the local church rejects a person accepted by Jesus- when a harsh, judgmental, and unforgiving sentence is passed on homosexuals: when a divorcee is denied communion; when the child of a prostitute is refused baptism; when an unlaicized priest is forbidden the sacraments. Jesus comes for the ungodly, even on Sunday morning. His coming ends ungodliness and makes us worthy. Otherwise, we are establishing at the heart of Christianity an utterly ungodly and unworthy preoccupation with works".
and finally: "The story goes that a public sinner was excommunicated and forbidden entry to church. He took his woes to God. "They won't let me in, Lord, because I am a sinner." "What are you complaining about?" said God. "They won't let me in either". Brennan Manning - The Ragamuffin Gospel


Heard that last line from the church I went to lol

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