Pooping. Peeing. Trimming your hairy bits… could you do any of these things while your partner was next to you brushing their teeth in the bathroom? When it comes to sharing your personal moments are you a bit prudish or happy to let out huge parp in front of your other half? Aaron Darkwood asks More… you the question: could you share everything with your partner?
I was just reading an article online about what women do that they don’t want their husbands or partners seeing them do. Stuff like toilet trips, burning facial hair off and the like. The conversation was centred about the differences between males and females… so what about gay men?
Well, as gay men we have the same bits, and since I’m a guy this will be guy-focused, but it’s equally the same for females, and for this article I’m talking as a complete novice, as I’ve never had a live-in partner to learn all these things. So, you tell me: is there anything you wouldn’t do in front of your partner?Talking toilet
I’ve known couples that used the toilet in front of each other. Is this something you do? If you’re single like myself, is this something you think you might do? How about all those various bathroom sounds you might create… or even sounds that aren’t restricted to the bathroom? Would you openly break wind in front of your partner in the lounge, while watching TV? “Better out than in,” someone once quoted me, as an excuse for them to pollute my airspace with the stale contents of their duodenum! Not something I appreciated from them as a friend, but would you overlook it in a partner?
I’ve had some friends, and even some family members, who took great fanfare in being able to fart openly, proudly like it was some great achievement! No conscience at all, no decorum. I’m not comfortable with this at all. So, someone has a hang-up; is it me or them? Yes, it’s a natural bodily experience, and yes, if you forcibly kept all gasses internally then you would eventually be ill, but still, I don’t find it pleasant!To poo or not to poo, that is the question…
As for other things, there are obviously the gay sexual fetishes of water sports and all of that, but would you take a pee with your partner in the bathroom, while he or she is brushing their teeth? Would you sit there and take a dump while they were in the shower? Right now, as a single guy, these are things I couldn’t imagine doing with a partner present. I wouldn’t be comfortable, no matter how familiar they were with my body. What about you?
The article I was reading also talked about cutting toe nails in front of someone as something that was bad. Now for me, this doesn’t even get onto the radar as something personal. I wouldn’t have any objection with this, either doing it in front of a partner or on a stage in front of an audience; toe nails aren’t a personal thing really! I would make every effort to be hygienic and pick up all those ricocheting toe nails as they bounce off walls and furniture, but I wouldn’t be embarrassed about it.Showing off your skin
How do you feel about nudity? I always have a laugh to myself in various films where a couple have had sex – Bond films are great for this – and amongst all the frantic intimacy, the moment afterwards, the female immediately covers her breasts? Now this may just be for the film of course, but I’ve heard that some partners are embarrassed to be seen naked with each other? Are these the same couples who only have sex with the lights out? As for myself, I have no issues here; I sunbath on nudist beaches, change at swimming pools etc; it’s just flesh. But are there gay couples, or LGBT couples, who don’t want their partner to see them naked? Maybe undressing carefully, slipping into some nightgown without ever exposing anything? Then slipping beneath the covers?
Are you someone that burps unselfconsciously? Is this something you do in front of anyone, in front of your partner, or not in front of anyone? Again, I find this a manners department rather than modesty, but throwing it out there for all of you guys and girls, who may want to debate it!
Let’s head back into the bathroom for a moment, as this is a place we seem to do a lot of self-grooming amongst other things. Would you lock the bathroom door? Do you now, when a partner is inside? How about when you’re shaving? Face, legs, other 'bits'? Are these public domains? Admittedly, I’ve never seen anyone at the swimming baths do this in the showers, but would you do it at home in front of a partner? Again, I’m OK with this. Some future partner can partake in ringside seats that is the usual bloodbath when I have a shave should they choose, it wouldn’t be off-limits for me. The same with bathing or showering with a partner, but I think that part is pretty much a given in most intimate relationships… that is unless your bath or shower doesn’t fit two (do you take the taps end, or do you force them to sit there?! LOL!)Going solo
And finally, what about those other personal moments? OK, I know I said I wouldn’t talk about it, but hey, I’m a gay guy, we gotta talk about it, right? There are those times when each of us just has to release the naturally built-up fluids within our bodies through the time long tradition of masturbation. Is THIS something you would do in front of a partner? Is it something you would do by yourself if they were just tired? If you were mid-stroke and they walked in, would you shriek in terror, grabbing for the bed covers? Or would you not even bat an eyelid?Like this? You may also like: Gay and Single Forever: Does hope of finding love fade with age?Getting back into the dating gameReligion and homophobia: what impact does it have on us?