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Old Woman Downstairs - Gay Guys! <3

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The old woman downstairs is going senile, for the second time this week she was in the street with a bunch of wrong keys (probably belonging to locks which had been changed the previous times the same happened). On friday afternoon you can't get anyone to help so I called the police, and they sent two glamorous young policemen, very smartly uniformed, handsome like film stars. It was suddenly like I was in a teen action movie, but they couldn't get the door open either and finally there arrived a very large van from a glass company, they took a window out while the old wo-
man went around mumbling and trying the same wrong keys again and again. She had been so sure that the keys were the right ones this time, that she wouldnt be convinced by the evidence of her own eyes and just kept on trying. She must have been doing that for 3 or 4 hours. also asking strangers in the street for keys to try on her door. They're all polite and friendly, indignant that no one seems to bother, until slowly they realize she's nuts... Very surreal. THE NEXT DAY: I went out to go to the supermarket and there she was again, fiddling with the same stupid keys as she did yester-
day, trying to open the door. But this time she wasn't alone, she had befriended an old man, a doctor, no less, who was helping her! A good catch! And suddenly she wasn't so senile anymore, but just her previous vicious self. Has she been faking all the time? Was all this helplessness and stupidity just a heinous plot to catch
a man?


nice story


A while ago my partner and I noticed an old lady sitting on the step in front of our house. I went out to ask her if she needed any help. She was very nicely dressed and I noticed that she was wearing a lot of jewellery that looked expensive to me. She said she had come to visit a friends nearby and that they weren't home. She had been trying to call them on her mobile phone. She looked up the number in a book and typed it into the mobile but I noticed the mobile was in fact dead. It was flat. She didn't understand that and just kept trying. I got my phone and called the number but there was no answer anyway. I thought she was just old and just didn't understand the difference between a mobile phone and a normal land phone.

We decided to offer to take her home in our car. The place she said she lived wasn't too far away but too far to walk and it was a hot day. She accepted and I went off around the corner to where the car was parked to bring it closer while my boy friend stayed with her. There was a space in front of the house now so I parked and waited for them to get in but my boyfriend was gesturing to me to get out with an angry/confused look on his face.

There was a filthy mattress that someone had dumped out the front of their house a few houses up from ours waiting for the garbage collectors to take. It had been there for a few days. The old lady wanted us to put it in our car and take it to her home. We said no way. "Its a good mattress" she kept saying. Then she got angry and told us to go away, so we did but we were still a bit worried about her but anyway, she disappeared.

About an hour later, we were going out and as we got to the car, we noticed she was sitting on the gutter a few houses up near the mattress still trying to dial her mobile. As I said, it was a very hot day and she had been sitting around for at least two hours worrying about a filthy mattress and dialling a dead mobile. That is when it dawned on us that she was crazy / demented.

So we called an ambulance and waited with her until it came. The woman on the telephone said I had done the right thing to call and just to wait with her. The ambulance guys (also very sexy as in the story above) said OK guys, we will look after her and so we left and went out.

Strangely, when we came back home later, the mattress was gone.