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Kelli_Smith_50019

Confused~ - Lesbian Ladies

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Kelli_Smith_50019
Posted

So I am a bi-sexual possible lesbian. PLEASE HELP!! I am married. I do love my husband, but not the way I should. I am not sexually attracted to him and I hate sex with men. WTF do I do?


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Posted

Have you spoken to him about the issue?
I'm sure that anyone would recognise a problem if thier partner did not feel comfortable, and who do not feel sexually satisfied.
I know that alot of people say that they are sexually deprived, which yes I have that statement to my name aswell. But couldn't you discuss with him any issues that maybe arrising from the relationship that your in?

Srry for if this sounds rude, but in my mind, two consenting adults who are in a relationship with eachother, should want to help thier partner in anyway possible, conserning any part of life and relationship.


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Kelli_Smith_50019
Posted

It doesn't sound rude. Thank you for your comment. He knows I like women too but he doesn't know the extent of my struggle. I just really don't know what I want. I want both lol. I want the husband and kids and a gf on the side! If only life worked that way lol


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Posted

Unfortunately it doesn't work like that. There are many cases where married women find out that they are in love with another woman so your not alone. Talk to you husband about exactly how you feel and from there you can decide if you want to stay with him or pursue a relationship with a woman because right now it's not fair to either of you to live the way you are. Just saying what's on my mind


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Posted

Totally agree with you D'Andra.
It might be hard/ orrcuard, but you need to discuss this properly with your husband, and if he does'nt like it/ wont comply and help you in anyway, then it's your choise, but maybe a new start would help you.
You can't go on struggling like this, so please do yourself a favour...... don't suffer in scilence........ x


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Nebelpfade
Posted

But you know, you can have kids without a man, the gf could be the "hudband" lets say it that way. I mean, two womans can have a family of their own with kids. If you aren't interested into a mans body, well don't force yourself. If you dislike sex with a men, just say it to him. Accept the fact that it won't work with him. First he'll want sex, second you'll refuse since you won't like it. Then he might simply to seek other woman to fill that emptiness. How are you gonna get kids in that process anyway ? How are you gonna feel satisfied too ?


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Lizbeth_Ochoa
Posted

idk if this helps, but ever since i was young, lol i found playboy magazines under my older brothers bunk bed. lol when i saw it my heart started racing, & ever since then i realized i checked out woman. so the point is i knew i lked girls for sure. but just didnt know if i was bi or les. well i am now 23 yrs old. i have been in love with a girl before, but never for a man. i came out last yr bearly. before that ive always dated guys, just guys. & i was always curious. but i was afraid, ashamed of wht my family would think. but i got tired of trying to put other ppls happiness before mine. ex- my ex bf was in the marines, & i dated him for 2yrs 1/2 and never, ever did i enjoy myself with him, as much as i wanted to and tried. i was very faithful to him, commited, & it was in a long distance relationship. but it was better for me, bc i needed my space. anyways, it doesnt matter if he was financially supporting me (bc he spoiled ) he was happy, but i wasnt. & he knew about all of this also.. i thot maybe within time i would develop feelings for him, but it never happened. so we were the prudest couple ever.. i swear! so.. i felt bad for him, and didnt feel lke it was fair to him as "happy" as he said i made him. both me & him deserved better. i think everyone loves whts hard to get. until this day im bearly getting him off my back, & wht sucks is that we had a lott of financial stuff together. under both names. ugh yah ive been with my gf for going on 8 months, and he is trying his best to be with me (which bothers my gf) anywho, im way much more happier, more sexually active, & all the above with my gf


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Posted

maybe it's best to tell the truth?
you'll never know until you try
do you want that regret?


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Kelli_Smith_50019
Posted

Thank you for all your comments ladies!! Its nice to have support for once. My husband knows that I like women.....He knows that I hate sex.....But he thinks I hate sex with him because it hurts, which I do, but that's not the entire truth. I am sexually attracted to women but I've only ever been the receiver not the giver and I don't really know if I could be the giver if you know what I mean lol Idk. I want to be with my best friend which is my husband sometimes and sometimes I just want out ya know? I just don't know who I am. I am 25 years old I should be sure about my sexuality by now but I just don't know! I've never had "sex" technically with a woman so I can't say I like them better in that department. But I think penis' are disgusting and smell lol But hey that's my opinion haha. Idk I'm so depressed. I don't know how I feel.


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Posted

I know this probly wont help with the depression side, but if you can, then why don't you go out for the night with some of your girl friends, have a laugh and see what happens.
I'm not saying that you'll necessarily get laid, but be open with yourself and your girl friends. Might not be the best route, but personally if I was in your situation, I'd go out for the night with some girlfriends, drink/ party/ let my hair down, and open up just by being very flirticious.........


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Posted

I agree with Kate. That sounds like the exact thing you should do in your situation.


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