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Old pieces... - Poetry Group

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Posted

utterly alone, temporary
we are no more we than the time we have together
to be and just be, you and i,
our time ever fleeting beyond the sky,
lost in secrecy looking over our backs,
eyes abound always watching;
i could care less if we'd slip through the cracks,
to be and just be, you and i -
to hold, and hold a little longer
time is neither a friend to us,
close and far, and never in-between,
do you think of me, as i do you?
consuming my thoughts so freely, is it true?
our voices silent so far apart,
my breath stills, and ceases to start
when your warmth fades, and the cold sets in,
i feel my heart still and refuse to begin.
---
fate strung us along freely
when fun unfurled in a frenzy
and lead you to my heart dearly
your kiss spurned a fire
and lit my heart's desire
to touch, to hold, we laid
in your arms, what fate forbade
but eternity sung mere minutes,
do you hear?
the clock ticks as we threw our fears,
and risked our fate through a dare.
it was you and i,
with one last kiss
eternity held me in bliss.
---
the breath of a thousand seas
echo the stillness
of your voice...
and i, shipwrecked,
revel
in
your
warmth
upon the shore -
in tender touches you caress
effortlessly
the storm which lies within me
in you, peace finds me sweetly
---
i'm a prisoner of a
neurotic mirage
bound by self-inflicting torture
my heart grows weary.
illusions, disillusions
false hopes, false pain
the mind is a curious burden.
am i happy, i am happy
i've gone mad.
---
time is a cruel maiden
who spins her web endlessly
created by minds wrecklessly
we die by her hands solely
we are no more we
no different than He or She
no different than passerby's
coexisting nonexistently around us
our world is a fiend of energy
positively negative
nothing equates
the absolution of chaos
---
can't fuckin get a break these days
here and there, here and there
voices all around me all wanna be heard
tell me to listen, tell me to do this
suffocatin, rearrangin
tryin to live my life
and
figure
shit
out
can't even get a break for that
can't separate these voices all rambling at once
comin from all directions
tryin to give me direction?
figure out your shit first, before tryin to fix mine
passin judgements left and right, this and that,
this
and
that
i'm sick of listenin to nonsense
will somebody please make sense?
stress, madness, depression
the worst Hell is the one between your ears
im sinkin deeper, floatin further
soul searchin type crap doesn't work anymore
when your soul is slippin away from you
when things stop feelin real, and quite surreal
feelin the pressure, goin under-pressure
wide awake thru the AM, zombiefied by the PM
wanna scream, sick of wonderin if this is all a dream
nothing's what it seems
---
30 pills gripped tight in the
palm of my hand,
each filled with a question;
answers i can't understand
did things i can never take back,
i guess that's fine, maybe even sublime -
regrets are the things that teach you a lesson,
so heed everything, even give a listen,
the worst of things can only make you stronger,
if only these pills didn't weight so much -
maybe i'd believe these words I'm spittin'
just quittin', life's killin'
i'm sick to my stomach
---
suffocating words that mean nothing to me
the regrets of a writer's sanctity
lose the smiles, lose the faith, condemn jubilee
freeing out your soul isn't as easy, it seems
lose your ways, lose your love, lose the muse that feeds
every bit of passion that once burned so fierce
'til your breathless at your wake and reduced to tears
---
catatonic synchronicity;
the mind is a turbulent
(time bomb)
empty stares, on empty walls.
uncertainty smells
like
a
vapid
stench
of a dreaded fear.


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Posted

Wow! You feel so deep Danaea.
The part where you say. That he and she are all the same, I disagree.
We are all unique as God made us that way. Everyone thinks differently even though we have similarities we are our own person that even though we all compare to another person we all think differently and then also think a like at times too. You are a special human being who deserves to be happy.
We all have regrets that we can learn from. Just with all the questions you ask yourself in this poem shows you are seeking answers to your thoughts and it appears you are questioning is it all worth it? You are tired of the struggles of life. We are all alike in that respect and have all thought of it one time or another and anyone hasn't then they are not being honest with themselves.
Go to a place that is tranquil and beautiful to you and somewhere you can find solace.
God gave us a lot of beauty in this world. They are the trees and streams of water. They are the mountains, and sunsets and rainbows after a rain which helps to cleanse (metapmorphically) the world of it pain and ugliness. Look for the little things around you. Birds are the voices of our world that God gave us to enjoy and listen too. It is funny when I am down I notice more birds seem to come around. Is it a message that God is sending to me because he knows how they make me feel? Every day you can find symbolizim in the little things of life, find these and they will also help you answer some of your questions of desperation that you now feel.
This is a beautiful expressive poem about pain and wonderment of analyizing
your thoughts and the life that surrounds you. I don't know if you believe in God but when I put my worries to the Lord and ask him to give you strength and help to answer you questions and pain and letting it all go you will be surprised what you will find. It has happened to me many a time.
You are loved more than you realize. Take care- with love- a friend you can find in me.


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Jeanie,

Thank you for your words & friendship. I do agree with the He & She verse bit that you're saying. We are all unique, and we do have things that separate us. But also it's more saying that, we are no different in that we are all
humans. We feel, we hurt, we find joy in the little things and sadness
in the things that remind us of something in our pasts. Our humanity is what's
true deep inside of us. And you're right, I am constantly seeking answers, constantly pursuing perhaps some inevitable quest for the finite or infinite understanding. It definitely helps having somewhere to go to. And when that happens, I like to get away for awhile. But I figure it's not all there is to life, you know. You do have to enjoy the little things, cause life is too short to miss out on it. There's the parties, and having a good time with the people you care about, also. And telling them that you care about them and enjoying that time you have with them. As for God, I do believe in God. I haven't been as connected or in touch with prayers and such, but from time to time it's helped to just let it all out. To believe in something more than just some mundane existence and whatnot.


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Thats true what you say of the Almighty being. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders.
Yes I agree with you too that we all feel hurt, and find joy and wonder about life. Even the animals hurt and have feelings too. I have always wondered what they were thinking. We have found how they see things in the world - whether it be black and white or color for example but wouldn't it be neat if we could capture their thoughts. We have learned the language of the dolphin and gorilla and other kinds of apes but can you imagine finding out the communication of a mole for example, or an ostrich, giraffe kangaroo. We understand their personalities but to be able to respond to them in a way like the monkey and dolphins. I know it is coming soon and I cannot wait to be able to know how a blind mole feels or thinks. LOL
Life is intreging that is for sure and to be curious can help any depressive thoughts don't you think?


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Haha, I try. But I have my flaws. Then again we're not all perfect, so. It happens. You know, it would be pretty sweet to know what the thoughts are of other creatures apart from humans. But I think, some things are best left unsaid. You know, some mysteries are better off left a mystery. I mean, there's only so much info/proof that a human can have and handle before things go awry. And that's something that's been proven time & time again. And I think that infallibility has something to do with our humanity itself, our Original Sin & flaws which shape us & teach us. And it restricts us for a reason.. But! If I ever get a chance to talk to a monkey...hell yeah, haha.


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Yea I see your point Danaea about leaving some mysteries of the world alone.
Like why do we want to clone ourselves. Aren't we messed up enough as it is and why should we play with mother nature and mess things up even more right?
You have a good point there. It was our sins from the original sin that has shape the world we are in today. To learn from our mistakes and each other but what I would love, like all the Miss Americas say every year, to have peace in the world universally. They say that peace is coming and for all of us to repent and ask for Gods guidance and forgiveness because his son died on the cross for all our sins so that somehow, someway, we can find peace in our lives before the earth comes to an end and becomes another nebula in the universe. People are talking about how all the birds are falling from the sky to give us a sign of what is to come and to start thinking about our souls instead of our pocket book and with all the unemployment, pensions being lost, and the health care system going awry is this a sign for us to dig down deeper and understand our spirituality before it is too late. We need to put Satan where he belongs and bring Christ back into our lives more than ever, bring prayer back into the schools too. After all even the saying on our money says in God we Trust.


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Messing up is what humans do best, I think. As far as cloning goes, I can probably go on & on about that, but more or less it's just wanting to live cause death is a hard concept to accept for some.

Peace however is a different matter. I think as much as Peace is ideal to have in the world, it can only go for so long. Conflict is something inherent and in a way, genetically inclined in humanity. People will never be satisfied, it's a constant hunger for more, for power, greed, lust -all things morally corrupt but in a way, required. Without it we'd never learn. War & Peace balances itself out. Everything has a balance. I think the best we can ask for is just...for once, for maybe even a day, people would just stop. Take a deep breath & chill out.

Birds falling? And here I thought people just had bad aim, haha. In all seriousness all I've ever heard lately is this apocalyptic agenda. Signs that the apocalypse is coming. War, pestilence, famine... 2012, etc, etc. People should have already been thinking about their souls to begin with if they cared enough. Perhaps its due to the fact that this era is desensitized from their spirituality. The lack of connection due to conflicting views from science to political issues mixed with religious fervor. Our money may say In God We Trust, but I've also heard of movements & peoples views to change that phrase, or rather even remove God in the pledge of allegiance, due to the fact that it simply hurts their feelings, or doesn't bode well with their faith. I've only got one thing to say about that: When in Rome, do as the Romans do. It's only a sign of respect & courtesy. But apparently...even that won't suit well for some in this country. And last I checked, this country was built upon by the faith of Christ, and laws written by the founding fathers who believed in God. Don't get me wrong, I don't have anything against other races or religious faiths & beliefs. More power to them for what they believe in. I'm merely saying, have respect & courtesy where it's due.


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Well I believe Peace is possible because if we can live by the commandments that God gave Moses and live by those, which I have tried
and lived by and have Peace in my heart for all those who cross my path.
We can learn just fine without war. We can actually learn more I believe because when we waste time killing each other we miss out connecting to ourselves and with each other. Hate blinds us from learning to negotiate and respecting others thoughts.
America is the melting pot of the world but we should teach those that come in our country to live by the laws set down in this land centuries ago.
And hurting peoples feelings of their own religions and hindering their freedom to express their own religious rights is totally wrong because all people who believe in Christ or Muhammed will be open to any prayer if they are truly believe in the divine and what he stands for and people from any denomination usually do not stand up and make a fuss . It is the atheist that had prayer removed from our schools. Lady fought to her death, literally to accomplish this and it makes me sick, because violence increased 100% in our schools in the next 2 decades since this ruling and there are more people in the United States who believe in a higher being than there are atheists so why did they win? Because we allowed it and we need to voice ourselves and and get it turned over and changed again. I have heard there are some schools still in Amercia that still have a morning prayer at the beginning of school and those schools have had no violence. I am not saying either though that this is the cure or total reason they have not had violence but it sure did not hurt us when we did have more prayer in the schools back when I was a pup.
Another subject Language: Here we are, the melting pot of the world but now we are required to speak spanish in order to be able to be at the forefront of getting a job. It makes it more appealing if you are bi-lingual. Well Canada sits above us and there are a lot of French speaking people too that have immigrated to our country and Canadians that come to live here but they learn English and speaking French doesn't always get your foot in the door for a job. Now why can't the Mexicans speak our language. There are Russians, and all sorts of Europeans that live here but they are all required to speak the English language and we do not have to learn their language to fit into a job requirement. I think there are just as many italians in this country as there are Mexicans but Italian never became a secondary language. My mother came from Yugoslavia when it was Yugoslavia and knew 7 different languages but had to learn English when she came here. So why do people from spanish countries speak English when they come here? It is not expected so much. We have had to conform to them. I don't think that is right.
Every other nationality has had to do it learn English.. Now spanish people have a foot in the door if they speak both English and Spanish for jobs over someone who may have more experience because they only speak one language - our English language and that irritates the hell out of me. I am not prejudice either, I love Spanish people - I love all people from all walks of life,
but if you don't know spanish in some job markets it is hard to get a job. That's screwed up.


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But I have to wonder sometimes, how do you teach a world learned of nothing but hate, rage & destruction the idea of Peace? Sure there are ways, to show and be an example of but... I feel that something horrific has to happen, so grand, so...huge in proportions to affect the lives of all the people in the world to actually change their hearts and move towards Peace. To want it, truly deep inside. As far as commandments go, that just goes back to humanity's loss of connection to their spirituality. One can only have Hope that things will change someday, but right now I think it's going to get ugly & worse before it gets any better. But there is Hope. So I guess it's not all a loss.

And as far as religion & languages, you're right. It's not fair. It is screwed up. And I don't have my prejudices on people either. I myself come from another country, and while I grew up here, it was common sense to me to learn English before my mother & I emigrated here to the US. And for me back in the day, it was watching American broadcasting of cartoons and trying to understand the language, and I can honestly say the English language is an option to be learned in schools outside this country. Perhaps it is due to the fact that the citizens and patriots of this country have lost their voice. Unfortunately, that means the people leading this country has lost it's voice as well. No one is willing to stand up, and say that "No, this isn't right." Or the few that do are only so few against a bigger scheme of things that it will be an even further struggle until the day someone finally snaps and something happens. Going back to the language, if it were any other country, I find it peculiar and somewhat irate that people would take the time to learn said country's language... People go to Italy, they try to learn Italian. To Japan, people try to learn Japanese. So why is America all of a sudden some kind of set-aside exception? It shouldn't be an exception. You go to America, you learn English. I feel that there's too much conforming to, not exactly unecessary needs of the people, but there's also not enough firm-hand being applied.


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Amen- I agree with yu too about what you said about the language. Go to rome speak the language the romans speak and it shoud be that way in America too. I think it may be because I think the Spaniard were considered being here before the English and those who called themselves Americans the true patriots. The Spaniards lived mostly in the west but also had control over Florida but still, we won the battles to put our name on these states and when we defeated the Spaniards we even kept spaniard names of streets and cities out of respect of those who were there before us. But then you have the poor Indians who were here first and were not treated so fairly. We just kept pushing here and pushing them there till they had no dignity left.

I think people are tired of the violence. What we need to do is start changing the way we do news. We need to show in the news the good things that are happening in the world. And there are thousands of organizations that are making a difference in peoples lives and why are they not in the news?
I stopped watching the news because it only talks about the violence in the world. I have decided to research the good that is going on in the world instead and I see that more and so my prespective has changed and I think the news should change too so give people can have more hope. When there is a shooting they need to tone it down. Make a statement and tell of the good stories that came out of that tragedy instead of giving the violent offenders the limelight. I believe this is why many of the terrorists and robbers and people who go nuts do this so they can be noticed. "I will be a part of history now". And you have to do ten good deeds before your even noticed. I do feel there are changes that are slowly happening but hardly anyone knows about it because it did not make the news.
And yes we do need to get back to our Spirituality. I see my grandkids and there is no teaching going on at home about God. They are taught to be good citizens of society but not to have God in your home scare me. I instill that into my grandkids though when I get a chance to see them. However My daughter belongs to a church and of course her daughter goes too so at least there are some young people in the world that believe in the power of prayer. My daughter goes to a black church. She tells me she believes in the African American churches because they truly care about each other. When she was sick they came to visit and sent cards and always are keeping in touch with her, helping them through difficult times. I was raised in the Catholic church and when I went through my hard times they did not help me one bit in the last year. I have found solace in groups like Alan-on who are truly caring people who understand what I have been through with one of my relatives for example and there are so many other organizations out there making a difference in the world but people have to reach out to them. They will not be on the news or in commercials.


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