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Selena_Sophia_Watkins

Lesbians HAVE to date Bisexuals - Lesbian Ladies

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Posted

The reason for this posting is because of the recent controversy caused by a simply question, Why don't lesbians date bisexuals? Now, I keep getting these rude and outrageous messages about "hating bisexuals". So....you all mean to tell me that because we are all being judge by a group of our peers that we have to suck it up and date one another instead of sticking to our likes and preferences? I'm just asking because that's pretty much what is being said. Just because a lesbian says she would rather to not date a bisexual does not mean she hates them. It means exactly what it means. That's her preference. Why is that a big deal? No one is discriminating on your sexuality. You are who you are and no one can change that. But why get mad at someone because they say they prefer not to date you? That's the same as someone saying, "I only date dark-skinned females." or "I only date Asians." SOME people do have specific reasons why they don't date someone. Instead of getting upset, ask why or simply take that as a sign to look elsewhere for someone. That's another reason why I never went "looking" for love. I let it come to me. When you search for someone to be with, it almost never works out because you are looking for something that you don't understand. Love can only be found when it is ready and willing to come to you. I always speak out when it comes to matters like these because it isn't right. Someone supposedly is discriminating against you and then you turn around and act just like the accused. You cannot do that! It solves nothing. I really want those who sent me those nasty messages to go ahead and speak on this. Why does a lesbian have to date a bisexual girl? Please show me the rule on being gay that says this.


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Alanna_Christine
Posted

there isn't one? not that i know very many lesbians but i've never had someone say they wouldn't date me based on my identity. i agree, a preference is a preference. if that happened to me, i'd be a little hurt but i could see where the came from. Mabey they dated a bi girl before and she left for a man, or knowing the gf having been with men...something about that, who knows. It's not a reflection of the person themselves...it's just a preference.


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Posted

thank you for understanding that hunnie! I wish there were more like you and wish that the ones who are like you, would speak up.


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Heather_Darby
Posted

I totally agree with you Selena! Its a shame that people seem to think bisexuals have been negatively stereotyped by gays and lesbians in the LGBT community. I think everyone in the LGBT community are just naturally really defensive because we do get a lot of discrimination and crap from society.


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Sandra_Rodrigo
Posted

I agree with you too Selena. I'm sorry to hear that people sent you hateful messages. I think this whole topic was just a bit confusing to get around. Its all up to the individual person. Its their heart and its their needs, and nobody can tell them to do something they don't want to. Bi girls often say they love who they love, and its the same for everyone else. We love who we love, and we all have a choice.


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Posted

i agree with you all. but this is how i i seethings if you don't mined hearing what i have to say. If someone doesn't like you, don't take it to heart and say its cuz you bi, gay, or lesbian, its probably cuz they just don't wanna date you tho. I had a girl i dated who freaked when we broke up and i started to date a boy. But you see at the time i had still bin Bi-curious. I didn't now who i liked. But now i just like girls, so i don't care if shes bi, or lesbian. if i like her thin i will date her. that's how i feel. thank you for lessening to me.
Mel.


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Posted

Wow that's ridiculous, who ever freaking said that should go home and really take a look in the mirror and re-evaluate themselves. Because I am going to guarantee that she does not know what the hell she wants or who she really is. Most the time when someone says shit like "oh you won't date me because I am bisexual' is just trying to blame someone else for their own flaws so they don't have to deal with them. So here is a little advice for all you insecure people, learn to love who you are before you expect anyone one else to do the same.


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Posted

You I often wonder why it is that the LGBT community gets frowned upon so often, so honestly I think part of the reason is that we as a community fight amongst ourselves. How can we expect the straights to except us if we cant except each other? I say to each there own. You wanna love men, go for it. You wanna love women, good for you. You want to change your sex, more power to you. Seriously, speaking as a gay woman, sometimes I can not stand the gay community. We all want equality, we fight for our rights everyday, so start living what you preach. Except all these beautiful women and men for who they are, not by what you want them to be. We are all sisters and brothers fighting for a common cause, so act like it. Get off your fucking high horse and open your eyes. The world is no longer black and white, there are so many shades of gray. I for one say "Live and let live". Have a good one.


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Posted

Sorry for all my spelling errors and shit but I was in a hurry and didnt proof read before posting. Sorry.


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Kim_Lew
Posted

Mm, maybe for the hateful people, you need to make a VERY simple and plain example, or rather, metaphor? Like....

Icecream! There are many different flavours of icecream, and not everyone likes every flavour, not because some flavours are bad, but because people just have preferences. EG I like icecream in general, but given the choice, I would opt for dark chocolate rather than pistachio.

How's that? Probably not as coherent as others here could be though...


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Posted

Actually I love that. It makes a lot more sense then a lot of shit i have read. I think I am going to hi jack that from you.


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Posted

Yeah I think some people just miss the point of it all. Thanks for all who commented. I just get tired of people acting as if there is this huge seperation within our community because we all choose to date who we choose to date. Dating and friendship are different. I have friends from all backgrounds, sexualities, races, whatever. I love them all the same for who they are. Half of them, I wouldn't date because of my preferences. That's it! And I do love the Ice Cream analogy. It makes perfect sense. But its sad that it took for it to be said that way for everyone to understand.


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Posted

Okay first of all true lesbians don't like dating bisexuals because of th simple fact is that 1. We don't want to be left for a guy. 2. Dick is gross. 3. We don't like sharing our women with men. 4. Its just not in our book of rules and regulations. 5. Bisexuals need to pick a damn side because we hate being played like little fiddles. Get it got it GOOD. Now lesbians don't have to date bisexuals okay so just get over it already. GEEEEZZZZZZZ WE ARE LESBIANS FOR A REASON WOMEN ONLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! NO MEN! MEN=DICKS WHICH = BIG BIG BIG HEADACHE. BISEXUALS=GIRLS AND GUYS WHICH = DOUBLE THE TROUBLE AND DRAMA AND SORRY DRAMA IS BE LEFT AT HOME FOR YOUR MOMMA. SO GET IT OVER IT YOU SILLY LIL BISEXUALS PICK A FREAKING SIDE ALREADY.


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Posted

Okay Callie, I don't agree with that statement because most females who are bisexual believe that love in genderless, at least the ones I know. Why should someone have to limit themselves when it comes to love? That is their way of life. That would the same as someone telling us that being with women, as a woman, is nasty and we don't need to do it. Now this is a form of discrimination when comments like these are made. I did not start this thread as a space for drama so please do not do that. It's alright for you to have your opinion but when you are knowingly bashing others or intentionally hurting them, that's not okay.


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Posted

first of all, all communities fight amongst themselves. gays aren't any different. its just a preference. same as blondes vs brunettes etc. i understand why a lot of lesbians don't date bisexuals. if you're not confident enough in yourself, its pretty daunting dating somebody who's interested in everybody (so to speak, not literally). in my own personal experience? the bi girls i've dated have been nothing but indecisive and trouble. so... not that i'd NOT get to know someone because of who they are, but it would make me pause before making a commitment.


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Posted

Hey Selena, Ok first off Callie was just saying how most lesbian's feel toward bisexuals and just because she is being upfront and honest does not mean she is bashing on anyone. You wanted to know why most lesbian's don't date bisexuals there you go. The truth hurts honey and at least callie had the guts to say it like it is and trust me I have known that girl long enough to know that when she believes strongly about something she is not afraid to be honest and upfront about it. Now as for you if you don't want to hear everyone's opinion on this subject then don't post the topic, its that simple. Callie is just saying exactly how it is for most lesbians, maybe not every lesbian feels that way but most do. So get off your high horse and let people say what they want too, if you don't agree with that cool but do not single people out just for giving their honest thoughts and feelings on the subject you posted. If you didn't want drama you shouldn't of posted a sensitive subject up.


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Jordyn_Beck
Posted

I'm bisexual because I have sexual feelings for both men and women, the same for alot of people, females included. So no some of us won't be picking a side anytime soon but I think we're as bad as straights if we judge people in our own community.


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Posted

i've dated a few bisexual girls and never really had a problem with it. i've always been a little worried about them leaving me for a guy and not being able to satisfy them enough and blah blah blah. but i learned to push that fear aside and just love like crazy! :]] my current girlfriend's bisexual and i dont have a problem with it at all bc i know she loves me and wants to be with only me. :]


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Posted

Here we go again. I'm not on a high horse sweetheart. Like you said, She has her opinion, which I said she is entitled to if you read my entire post, and so am I. Anyways, being upfront and honest is one thing but what people have to realize is that the way you say something and the way others take it is two completely different things. It doesn't matter how you meant to word it or how it should have come across, it's how others take it. We can be honest about something and not come off as a jerk, in sense, when doing it. That's all I was saying. And that is another issue with "discussions", why does drama always have to present itself? Why can't there be a conversation started without drama being present?

Jordyn, thank you for your feedback. I would never tell anyone to pick a side. I just want everyone to understand that if someone chooses not to date you, try to understand before taking it to heart, ya know?

Kimmy, I'm glad you were able to find that happiness with your girlfriend. Good luck to you both!


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Posted

Oh yeah!!! To answer the question that someone asked earlier, no it's not just the LGBQTIA community that has issues with one another but with us constantly asking for others to give us the respect that we want, we have to first give each other that respect. As of today, WE are seen as the major minority being that we are on a constant quest to belong. To me, it just seems unfair to ask our peers to see us as humans and not just as another gay person and we can't look at ourselves and each other the same way. For example, when I was younger I would always get that speech about treating others the way you want to be treated and blah blah blah and the same ones who were telling me that, were treated others like shit. It made no sense to me how someone can stand on a soapbox and preach about doing good all day long and still have so much hate in the heart. That is what we are going through today. Thats another reason why I posted this. I don't have hate towards anyone. how can I? How can I ask our parents, families, churches, friends, etc. to love us just the same if I hate someone just because of who they are? Doesn't make sense, does it? I know that a lot of you are still going to say that others communities go through the same thing, but we are not other communities. We are us. Why do we have to be like everyone else? We aren't, so we have to stop trying to be. Take the little things that were given to you and use them to your advantage or to help someone who lacks in that area. It just makes sense, at least to me.


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Posted

Selena you posted this stupid topic because you were angry about the emails from girls you were getting and u felt a need to express yourself, right? I did read your whole post and now I am going to express myself. You can't post a topic like "lesbians have to date bisexuals" and not expect to get negative feed back or have drama. Because like or not sweetheart drama is never going away because people are never going to agree with each other their is always going to be two or three views of everything. You have no right to call anyone a jerk, especially if you don't really know that person, you only said what you did because you read something you didn't like but people express themselves in different ways and you are right people take it differently. You got angry at what she said but why? Did you really get mad at the fact that she was harsh about the truth on a topic you started? Or are you mad at the fact that some lesbians really do feel that way? The point is she spoke how she felt and you singled her out for it, I don't see you singling out anyone else for voicing their opinions so you tell me why the fuck you posted this shit up if you didn't want to hear all sides good and bad of it? We can't sugar coat everything to your satisifaction so you can either be like whatever moving on or you can keep being closed minded.


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Kim_Lew
Posted

I'll admit I was confused with the title of this thread too. It's like saying, "you HAVE to go to church!" And that will never work. Especially not with me.


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Posted

It is not that serious Jaimee. Never called her a jerk. Did I include her name anywhere near that statement? No ma'am. And I didn't single her out. I made a statement behind hers as I did with others. Positive and negative will come up, obviously. And I never got "angry" with her. If that's what you think, that's your opinion. I titled the article that way on purpose. This is what was being said by a numerous amount of people. That's why I posted this. And no it was not just because of some emails that I got. It was to address something that a lot of people were not saying. Like I said before, it's not the serious. Everyone always forgets the real reason for a topic.


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Posted

First off, i am not writting to bash on anyone.I'm just expressing my true feelings. I'm lesbian,and i am proud of it. I've been with my girl for 5 years, and i dealt with drama from all kinds of people. My parents know that im lesbian, they dont like the fact, that my girlfriend is African-American, but you know what. When I'm with my girlfriend, i can careless about anybody else. I have my preference on who i date, which is lesbians only. I dont have anything against Bisexuals, its just not for me. I'm just strictly into lesbians thats it. i just wanted to express my thoughts here, however i have friends from different backgrounds.But you know what im just into lesbians. Im happy with my girlfriend, and i hope the best to everyone.


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Posted

Whatever Selena I am done talking to you. You obviously need to go back and read ur posts because you did say and imply what you just said you didn't wither you meant too or not. But anyway I could care less, I just told you what I thought and I did it with a smile.


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