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Lindsey_Carter

What to do, what to do.... - Lesbian Ladies

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Lindsey_Carter
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So what if you find the girl you honestly thought didn't exist. Thats how perfect she is for you. Everything is going great. You two laugh and have fun everytime you're around each other. She's everything you've ever wanted... beautiful, ambitious, talented, sweet. Seriously, everything. Until one big bomb shell gets dropped on you. She's not comfortable with being gay. So much so that her family has told you to your face, as well as her's, that she will not be gay and its not acceptable. Now I know most say "be your own person, screw what they say" but her family has ties to her business as well as her bank account. They can and will make life mighty hard for her. Not only that but you find out due to her family being so condescending, she has hidden that she is gay from most of her friends, so you only get to meet the select few. Also just to throw in there, she's an AMAZING motocross racer. So amazing she made it to nationals at Loretta Lynn's this year. Woot. Sorry, I'm like a proud momma bear or something. But anyways, your first trip out to the track to watch her race, you find out another huge piece of the puzzle. She has to act straight while she is around everyone. And I'm talking like some major acting because she joins in on the "oooh and awww" with the other girls at different guy racers just to make sure they don't think she's gay cause they are all the time asking why she isn't dating someone cause well she's hot. ;P That is how uncomfortable she is with being gay. Its a huge secret. And her own family hates it. The first time I met her dad he told her right in front of me that he would buy her a brand new truck if she would date a guy. Her grandmother then told me that if her granddaughter was gay, which she made sure to tell me that she didn't really think that, then her granddaughter would just have to be alone for the rest of her life because they didn't accept it. And now, thanks to her family and friends and her not being comfortable with her sexuality, we're in this HUGE fight and we can't even talk to each other right now because I never ever no matter how someone reacts hide who I am. So we're like complete opposities on the subject. And she strarted freaking out cause we're getting really close and she doesn't know how to handle it or even if she can with the people she's around. So I guess what I'm asking is... What the heck do I do???


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Nebelpfade
Posted

Does she really need her parents money to live her life ? And aren't parents supposed to make life easier for their childrens ? But then, it's normal she's not comfortable with being gay, if her parents doesn't accept it at all. But then, do her family really have to know about it ? If id go out with a girl, the last person id tell would be my mom, and I live alone with her. Cuz she doesnt make me comfy to talk about gay stuff with her, even if she accepts my sexuality. But then, to buy out her child with material is bad ! I would prefer being lesbian and proud about it, with a truck than to have one and to date some random guy that I wouldn't even like.


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Lindsey_Carter
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Well she of course kept dating me after her dad's little bribe about a truck and she told him to shove it. We've been trying to stay strong for five months. She is trying to slowly break away from her family. She quit school at sixteen and went to private home schooling to take over part of her family business with her older brother. Her dad owns his own trucking company and then another business and he handed the smaller business over to her and her older brother. So since sixteen she has put everything, including relationships, on the back burner to the family business which also includes motocross racing because all three kids in their family race. Her bank account is a joint one, her house even she lives in also has her older brothers name on it as part owner, and I pretty much think that her family has made sure to incorporate themselves into every part of her life just about. She's trying to quit the family business and get a job on her own, but well in this economy and around where we live there are no jobs so it would almost be a stupid decision on her part to just up and leave a business that she has worked at since sixteen and will probably not get much out of when she leaves since its family owned. She is VERY close to her family, for better or worse. I get along her mother and her younger brother cause they seem less judgemental but unfortunately she is closer with her older brother and father. I just don't know how to tell her to grow up, get her own life, and stop caring what they think because I don't want to pretend that I'm more important than her own family.


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Seriously if I was in your shoes I would not hesitate to leave her. I could not put my feelings on hold while she figured out if she was ready to be who she really is. I would not put up with being second string to everything else. I couldn't be a closet lover, ever.


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Lindsey_Carter
Posted

Just an update, the short version...
We broke up, I started dating someone else who got really annoying so I was fixing to break up with the girl anyways and the same day my lovely motocross babe decides she can't stand to keep her mouth shut anymore and she decided that she didn't want to be without me, and that being without me was ten times worse than what she had imagined. Then she came out of the freaking closet!!! Publicly she told everyone, fellow racers, family members, friends, complete strangers, everyone, that she was indeed a lesbian and had also found the girl who made her want to tell everyone because she couldn't be without her. That being me of course. I never thought it would end up this way, I'm not the girl who believes in "happily ever after"... but I have to say, this was everything I wanted and so much more. I'm so proud of her!!! But thanks for the advice and listening to me vent you guys! Wish us luck, we're still battling it out with her very intolerant father.


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