Jump to content
Lindsey_Schnell

Out in the workplace - Bi Bi Bi Women

Recommended Posts

Lindsey_Schnell
Posted

Okay, I have a question for everyone:

Are you 'out' at work?

If so, how did you go about it? How did your coworkers react? Do you feel more comfortable now that you're out?
If not, why not? What is holding you back, and would you like to be out in the future?

I ask this because of a situation that has just come up. I've been working at a new job since April, I work in a clothing store with a small group of women. Being there for a few months now, I'm becoming friends with a few of the girls I work with. Today, they suggested we all find each other on Facebook. I'm not sure what I want to do about it. I'm out to all my friends and some of my family. My Facebook states right in my 'Interested In' section that I like men and women. However, none of the girls at work know that I'm bi, and I'm not sure how they'll take it. I know the typical 'if they can't accept you for who you are, they're not people you need to be friends with' response, but these are people that I have to work with and see every day. It's not like I can say screw them and not have to deal with it.

So that's my predicament. Do I just add them and not bring up the issue unless they do? It seems to me that unless you're LGBT yourself, you're not usually checking to see of other people are. So part of me thinks I shouldn't worry about it. Plus, if they've looked me up, then they've seen it already. I'm leaning towards adding them, or at least waiting for them to add me and accepting, but I'm still heavily conflicted on the issue.

Let me know what you think.


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

some people know and some don't. i like to drop hints so people get confused. its fun. then if they say anything rude about it, i make sure to tell them that the union will be on my side in the discrimination suit. cause its really no ones business but my own. why should they care?


Share this post


Link to post
jessicazylee
Posted

This group for gay professionals might be a little better for this
http://gays.com/groups/life/658/gay-professionals

Personally, I'm big on privacy settings, and double checking ur workplace's rules and anti-discrimination policy. And quite honestly, most ppl dont go poking around who you are interested in, but rather ur pictures and such.

Share this post


Link to post
Lindsey_Schnell
Posted

Thanks, I'll try posting there as well!


Share this post


Link to post
jessicazylee
Posted

oh and to answer the original questions:

I am completely out at work... hell I was recruited because I was the president of the Queer Student Union at Purdue University, founding sister of Gamma Rho Lambda [Progressive sorority that includes transgender individuals], a sitting member of the LGBTQ Advisory Board under the Vice Provost of Diversity at Purdue University, and a member of National Organization for Gay and Lesbian Scientists and Technical Professionals.

my coworkers dont really care, although it's caused a few awkward conversations from the bouncers about sex [they were just trying to treat me like one of the guys, not realizing i'm a big prude]. oh and all the bartenders and shot girls ask me for approval of their outfits ['is this sexy enough?'] before work o0;;;; AWKWARD.


Share this post


Link to post
Lindsey_Schnell
Posted

Haha. Well I'm glad you can be (mostly) comfortable being out at work. The girls I work with don't seem to be the type to judge, but you never know.


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

I came out to a few people at work. I just didn't tell my boss or the workers close to the boss about it. None of the co-workers I told we're weirded out by it and they were just more curious about it then anything else. They're lots of fun to work with and they don't treat or act any differently around me


Share this post


Link to post
Tamika_Taylor
Posted

If you really enjoy the company of your coworkers, then add them. I'm not suggesting you should but I'm saying if you feel comfortable with it. My boss doesn't fully know I'm Bi but she knows about my situation with my gf (nothing bad between us just her stresses at home.) Most people when I add them, I don't talk about my bisexuality unless they bring it up. If they don't, I don't tell them anything unless it's the topic of the day. When I told my cousin about me being bi, I was surprised to find out that he was a closet gay. He prefers it because of his parents, which is understandable. Now am I fully open to everyone? I'm not sure what I am and it's mainly because since I'm been with my gf for almost a year, I feel like I have a different mindset, like a bisexual with curiousness of lesbianism. As far as the work place goes, my boss just knows about my relationship, I don't recall telling her I'm bisexual. She might remember. I'm out to most of my friends and some parts of my family but the choice is yours if you choose to add them as your friend on Facebook. Not a lot of people will add your to talk to you about your interested but to keep in contact with you if they need you.


Share this post


Link to post
jessicazylee
Posted

workplace is one of those "do i bring my full self to work" or "this is my private life its therefore none of their business".

i'd let HR and my supervisor be aware first, since they can help and protect me. and also, they can guide you on what's good or not. next would be to find an organization at the workplace which might be geared. granted this is all what works in the corporate environment


Share this post


Link to post
Tamika_Taylor
Posted

That sounds like to good idea. Who knows what kind of harassment you will get at your work place. ugh.


Share this post


Link to post

×