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from femme to butch - Lesbian Ladies

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i have never been the type of lesbian to fit into a certain mold. i classify as a lesbian thats it. i am a female who loves females. people have classified me as either Boi or Butch, and i guess i could see it, but in all honesty i dont care.

we as lesbians have been fighting for equality for a very long time, and yet i have noticed the more i look round lesbians are intolerant of lesbians as well. take me for example. i may be called Boi or Butch, so other people think i should only be attracted to Femme girls, but thats not so. i love all women from femme to butch. when i walk into a bar with a butch on my arm, thats not kosher, or another Boi thats not kosher.

Why isn't? does it really matter. i have seen some great people shunned because they dont look gay. i have a lesbian friend, who is gayer then gay, who actually got laughed outta a bar because she looks straight. are you kidding me?

these are just my rambling thoughts.


there are multiple other threads on this very same topic but I think you said it best. totally agree by the way


In the transgender community we call that the "Trannier than thou" mentality, that others precieve you as "not good enough" in some way or that you don't fit ---THEIR--- standard of how things should be. Some people see me as straight because I like girls ---but--- I used to be a guy (and technically still am until I get expensive surgery)

I see republicans do that to themselves, as well as transgenders, lesbian, religious people regardless of religion, and every other 'clique' in human society. "If you're not like us, then you're someone/something else"

My advice is to never try to meet somebody else's standard of what you ought to be. Create your own standard, be that, and let others come to you and don't exclude anyone that might not think they are good enough to hang with the best.


I totally agree. I really can't be classified. some days I dress like a girl other days I feel like wearing loose clothes so I look more like a guy. the way I think also goes along with this. and to me it all depends on the natural look of a girl. if the way she dresses and stuff suites her not "oh I only like the girls that look like dudes/girls" not like that at all.


I'm not butch nor femme... I don't like owning a label tbh! same for me 1 day i'm a boy looking person and the next you can tell i'm a girl, but the thing is i have a boys face not a female face :/ which is rather much a piss take due to the fact of me always being called a man off other people which is sort of bullying :/ i think.. But yeah.. I get called transgender when i'm NOT!


when i first came out i admit i tried to shape myself around other lesbian women i have known, which means i was all hella girly, but i was very unhappy. i have never felt comfortable dressing or looking all femmed out. its weird looking at the pics of me when i used to wear dresses and shit. oh god i shudder. dont get me wrong i love being a woman, but i do not love anything that goes along with that.

we actually got pulled over the other day, and the cop kept referring to me as a young man. "excuse me young man, do you have any ID" "excuse me young man, can you step outta the car" blah blah blah. hell i dont mind getting confused with a young man, but when you get thrown in handcuffs and put in the back of a cop car because you dont look like who you say you are. my ID is years old, from when i was 18, and i do not look anything like that. it was humiliating.