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"JUPITER ASCENDING"--A MOVIE REVIEW

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Take a little of Cinderella, first seen cleaning toilets, add her prince or even better put in some DC Comics Superman who can’t fly--well he lost his wings--but does have floating boots that light up and help him skate all over the planetary system. Be sure to have a Lois Lane/Superman flying scene. Oh yes give this guy some pointed ears like Spock fro Star Trek and make sure he leads battle after battle after battle after battle from Star Wars

Never hurts to throw in some King Lear and/or Games of Thrones. When things get too hectic slow it down--very slow--and add a nonsensical love story. Here and there give the Cinderella/toilet cleaner/alien in Chicago a wise crack which would be funny in any movie but this one. Oh yes let’s not forget to throw in some Speilberg’s E.T.s and Lucas mutants.

Directors/screenwriters Lana and Andy Wachowski seem to have their second bomb in a row, after “Cloud Atlas”, and “Jupiter Ascending” is a $175 million seemingly unrecoverable mistake.

At one time special effects made a movie-goer’s jaw drop but now they have become such a part of various genres they really don’t have the effect they had and in a movie such as this where they as wall to wall and constantly repeated is almost becomes laughable if not boring.

Channing Tatum showed he is a first grade actor in “”Foxcatcher” while Mila Kunis earned her drama stripes in “The Black Swan”. Sean Bean has received several acting honors in his career while Gugu Mbatha-Raw showed her versatility last year in “Belle” and “Beyond The Lights”. Here’s hoping no Oscar voters will see Eddie Redmayne in this film or they may punish him when it comes to voting!

There are many supporting actors in the film who will probably forget to put this movie on their resumes which is understandable. The music is annoying and/or unforgettable while some of the costumes even Cher or Lady GaGa wouldn’t wear.

One suggestion, if you feel you have to see it, see it in a movie theatre as the only thing it has going for it is the first time they show a special effect.

Ending on a positive note I want a pair of Tatum’s floating boots, that light up, so I can go air skating up to visit you!



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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4ZzMkDLjWI


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