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Kayla_Marie_36563

my eyes are still open, so is my heart, it's time to close them both. - Love and Romance

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Kayla_Marie_36563
Posted

my eyes are still open, so is my heart, it's time to close them both.

Current mood: crushed

it's always hot and cold, on and off, confusing as fuck and then the simplest thing in the world. i think that he is absolutely perfect in every single way and i would give up my life to see him smile. the way he makes me feel is so out of this world words can't describe it. i love him so much i keep putting myself through this hell just for another kiss and when i get that kiss, feel his skin on mine ~extacy~ it's all totally worth it.

he made me feel safe and alive and just lively. i would love to be the one to make him smile. i wish that he would talk to me more and just like let me know what is going on, if i could read his mind that might help. i am tired of just being here and never knowing what's going on anymore.

i feel so distant and empty at the same time; wanting to be hugged and cuddled and loved as well as just left alone.

i guess what i really want is just to be with him...but just the fact that i love him isn't going to make up his mind for him, or in my favor. you tell me something and then do it but then stop, rewind, switch, repeat.

we try to be friends and it just doesn't work. and i don't think i would be able to just be your friend. i look at you and i see something amazing, i feel eletric and i want you. i guess everyone wants something they can't have at one point or another.

i will lie to you and tell you i am okay when i'm not, i will smile even when i want to cry, and i will tell you that you mean nothing when actually you mean everything to me.

i love you, goodbye.

i took the time to find lyrics that we know, lyrics we have sun and listened to, songs that were ours, music that we danced to. i put it on a box, written in hand, presents inside for you; the most sincere and honest note i ever wrote for you. my heart for you. you gave me a hug and then later, under your breath, i learned that your with her again, no one knew i heard...heartbreak for christmas.thank you and goodbye, it's been real, still love you, but i have to go.


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Wow, kayla. All I have 2 say 2 is BEAUTIFUL. I'm going tghru somethin similar 2 that currently but its a she not a he. I feel u. At the end of everyday, I'm proud of myself if I don't text or call her. Bn n luv is hell cuz u don't no when they're gonna leave. 1 day@ a time, it'll b alright. Did u write dat? Or personal xperience.


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Kayla_Marie_36563
Posted

uhm yeah it was all personal, i wrote it.

tonight i was having a snowball fight with my little cousin, he's sixteen i think, and i smiled and laughed and was having fun. it felt great.

it made me feel like i was just .. alive again.

and then i came home and started looking for someone new of the female kind.

decided after always being there for him to come back to, always being the one to support his decisions and hurt myself, i had had enough.


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Rachel_Mixey
Posted

I feel you too. My gf never tells me anything and we're always fighting and it's hurting me more than a relationship should...sometimes I really truly want to break up wit her but I can't. I know I can't live without her. She is my everything, even my air...so idk what to do. But I hope you get over him (if that's what you want) and find someone who loves you for you and tells you everything a lover should express. I'm here for you too now, cuz I know that it hurts and sometimes you just feel alone.


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Hi Ladies, Keep the faith, things will work out. I was in a relationship with someone who couldn't show any love, no hugs, just cold, and it was really hard to deal with because I'm a lovable person. Breaking up sucked but I feel like I have a chance to find someone perfect for me now.


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Kayla_Marie_36563
Posted

i realized today, that there are plenty of girls who would be with me, and since i can no longer find another guy appealing anymore i am going to get myself a girlfriend. i tend to go back and forth a lot but i know that i can make someone very happy and if he won't give me the chance to do that for him then i am going to find someone who will. of course i will still love him, and i know that he will still love me but i am trying so hard to just move on and be truly happy again even though it's harddd.

i am glad that my writing touches you and that you can relate to it. i might be younger than you but i believe that i am a good person, and a great friend and listener so if you ever need anything, feel free.


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