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oopster

crazy things - Love and Romance

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oopster
Posted

Was thinking about the things I would do to get close to someone I like, and was remembering my first crush.

I was 5, I think she was 10 or a bit older. I loved her as long as I'd known her, to the extent that I took up "bellringing", and found any excuse to hang out where she worked (the local library) later on.

Obsessive? Maybe.


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Posted

No u wasn't obsessive ma u just was in love


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JoniBear
Posted

love is always crazy ... and you did nothing wrong in trying to be as close to her as possible .... I know i did that during my schooling time to one of my classmate. She was very cool to me. I always did silly things just to get her attention to me. Lolz ....


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Posted

Yea I think we all did I know I did and I am still trying to turn her my way but I know it's gone take some time cause she is straight well now she is bi she got girls all on her jock now that I turned her out to the life


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Tina_Lyn
Posted

Idk what i would do to get close to someone dude. I have trouble with that area. I do the best I can with all the damn walls up I have from broken hearts I have incurred. I'm just sick of being broken hearted and sometimes would almost rather just be dead emotionally than hurt like that. But then on the other hand I'm missing out on a lot when i shut down like that. When I do open up, usually during some form of intimacy...easier that way because you are closest to someone when you are being intimate with them....that doesn't have to mean sex either. Intimacy for me is just stuff like, kissing, hugging, stroking hair, looking at, massage, ect. I love that stuff because that is where my guard comes down. I have trouble with it otherwise. So try intimacy. Not just meaning sex. Though that sometimes turns into that just from the intense touching. I totally feel the most and best when I am being intimate. Bottom line. Try that. Best thing in the world for me and it beats ANYTHING else when it comes to a relationship. I love doing stuff, spending time, ect but intimacy is where its at for me dude. I am thinking......uh.....i also would say spend LOTTTTTTS of time together doing all kinds of different stuff. Find out what each other likes, dislikes. I learned in church yesterday to definitely get to know someones character before the intense intimacy starts so honestly. Start out with that. I have a rule. I learned it from my AA sponsor. Wait for sex for 6 dates or 3 months. Whichever comes first. Dates dont have to be official. You just are looking at getting to know character #1. Then comes the damn good stuff man. Good luck Sarah. Hope you are doing good, keep searching and you will find your forever too babe.


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Amanda_Lyon
Posted

Due to my broken heart I am having trouble with intimacy of any kind. I mean we do the hugging and kissing thing, but I still feel a guard up and we have had sexual contact, but not all the way. I find myself really stand offish when it comes to that and it is not her, it is me. I have a block or something up. My AA sponsor told me to wait a year to even get in a relationship and 6 months on the sex, but I don't know. I have spent a lot of time with a couple of girls here and there since my heartbreak in Dec. , but it is just not there. I can't do it for some reason. My head and heart is still clouded with visions and thoughts of my ex and its been 7 months. I am not sure I will ever get over her.


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Amy_Wells_54954
Posted

Amanda - its always hard to believe when breaking up with someone ive recently split up with my ex and the relationship was great and holds the best memories but you need to find your path to move on, 7 months is quite some time to get through heartbreak and everything takes time but it can sometimes be what you do with your time - something different that you might not have used to do? its really hard when everything around you seems to remind you of her but things were great when you were together and now things have moved on and you deserve to be happy

just let it all out babes, meet many different amazing people, travel and just enjoy your time things will slip into place nicely it always does =)


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Posted

Tina get a hammer and pull down those walls my girl, we all have had a broken heart at one time, some of us more than others but sometimes when you get hurt you just start piling up more bricks to an already huge wall. Remember that by building such high walls to keep the hurt out you are also preventing happiness and true love from entering your life. Love sometimes can hurt but lonliness hurts even more and if you dont give people a chance you will never know. I have done some crazy stuff for love and I have been hurt but I learnt from my mistakes and that has made me a stronger person. To stop trying will just make me a sour and lonely person and I prefer to get hurt than to stop trying and hoping that one day I will be with the right person. xxx


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Tina_Lyn
Posted

Amanda

I just found this quote.“Sometimes in our confusion, we see not the world as it is, but the world though eyes blurred by the mind.” I understand where you are hon. Been there done it and I too am in the program. You're sponsor is right about the year. I have been sober a while so the first year has come and passed. I do believe you are maybe seeking love a little too soon after such a traumatic experience with your last girl. I did the same thing and kept on breaking other peoples hearts because I was angry and hurt and trying to find someone to get back at (when really it was HER I wanted to get back at). Sick and twisted but it happens when you aren't ready. Its different if you come out of a loveless relationship and move into another one within a 6-12 month period but a broken heart takes MUCH longer to mend than just 6 months. Take more time and get comfy with you. Stand on your own a while. Learn to love YOU first. It was the best thing and time I have ever spent and DO still spend. Time alone with ME. I love my life and thank God daily for life and the opportunity to live it sober today. I'm hoping you stick around the rooms and listen to the folks who have come before you and share with you our experience, strength, and hope. Hugs to you honey. And I wish you the best I'm proud of you and all you have accomplished. Keep up the good work.


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JoniBear
Posted

Amanda .. i know how u feel .. cause i am still putting up a block surrounding me .. even thou it's already over 2 yrs, but i still comparing my other gf with my ex-gf that i love so much and even till now, i am still hoping i can be back with her .... Whenever my currect gf want to have intimacy ... i seem like distance myself away ... and i've told myself to let go of the ex-gf and love the current one ... but .... till now, i've yet to find anyone that can truly make me breathless ...


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Posted

Joni get over old girl get with the new one and be happy


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JoniBear
Posted

hi chaka ...any recomendation?


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