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Monica_Allen

Once a cheater, always a cheater? - Love and Romance

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Monica_Allen
Posted

Do you believe that once someone cheats, they will never be able to be faithful? that once it happens 3 or more times is it considered time to move on and stop giving them chances afterwards? whats your take on this?


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sandifer
Posted

i don't believe once a cheater always um speakn frm xperience i'm with my lady for 13yrs now and neva cheated b4 her i was in a 9yr and a 3yr with the ladies of my pass i was wat 1 wld call d suther i was neva faithful but then i met d woman of my dream and not once have i cross dat line. but if she ever cheated on me i will move on bcaz i kno i will neva forget but will forgive and i would rather hurt and accept the pain and move on than wonder if she wld do it again the trust wld b gone. some people forgive but do that forget, instead of people askin for forgiveness dey shld ask if they can forget wat happen bcaz as long as u don't forget no matter how much u love there will always b dat little voice ringing n ur head wondering if r when will dey cross u again . if u r strng enuf to maintain/stay hey i say BIG UPS TO YA to each own


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Dominique_Sullivan
Posted

It depends on the person, because some cheaters don't ever stop, but if they find the right person sure at the beginning they'll cheat, but if they really love you they'll stop. So if you are willing to take the risk that they might leave you then stay with them but if you don't want to have to suffer through that leave them.


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Josie_Smith_46476
Posted

(once it happens 3 or more times is it considered time to move on and stop giving them chances afterwards?)

From what you are asking it sounds like you have given one chance too many. Move on it is not worth the pain of it all, but that is my opinion.


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Posted

Personally I don't care if my partner only kissed another girl, I would leave. Cheating on someone is a sign of weakness. If you honestly love them and respect them you wouldn't cheat. I was wild once, but I never once cheated on anyone. Once you enter into a relationship with the knowledge that you are exclusive then you have a duty to them. Yes I say duty because it is. I don't care if you had to much to drink, or they flirted with you all night, you had a fight with your girlfriend, whatever the excuse, it is still cheating. If you cant be faithful then you have no business being in a relationship. I understand that humans by nature are not perfect and we all make mistakes, but I do not consider cheating a mistake. No one can accidentally sleep with someone. These are my thoughts on the matter.


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Samantha_Wendes
Posted

I have to agree there is no excuse for cheatin. I personaly can be blind drunk and still say NO.


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Tina_Lyn
Posted

Yeah, no way. I would leave if it happened ONCE. She would be out the door as quick as she cheated. I am a firm believer that once they cheat they will do it again if they know they can get away with it. I let women know when i meet them that if they ever cheat on me they are GONE. I have only had one woman cheat on me after long term and she ended up out the door and i pushed her into the arms of the woman she cheated on me with .....just the way it goes. Hurt like hell however i dont tolerate it. Cheaters are like children who get away with something...they will do it again if they know they can get away with it. I kissed another girl when i was really young and lost that relationship...she did the right thing looking back now cuz i really wasnt ready for a commitment at that age (19) and she was much older and much more ready for one. I probably would have had sex with someone eventually. I wasnt ready to settle down. That is also why I dont date really young women. They arent ready for commitment...most of the time....its just a sad fact cuz some are really gorgeous and sweet. Just not willing to take the chance. Sorry kiddo's... So If you have had a cheating partner I would end it now before it just gets worse....


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Samantha_Wendes
Posted

you have a good point. It seems that younger people are not ready for anythin meaninful, can't blam them though i was the same in my teens though i have calmed down latly,

I don't tolerate cheaters, it just ain't right. had it done to me and it really hurt so now i aviod any relationships that may end the same way.


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Tina_Lyn
Posted

Yeah i understand that. Im trying to stay away from people who could hurt me like that however its hard if you fall for someone who has the potential to do that....will hurt like hell if it doesnt work out and what I fear will happen , happens however sometimes cant help who you fall for....ugh.....so. I think in love we take the chance each time we get into a relationship with someone , that we may get hurt like that. Its just life. Life picks on everyone, and I try not to take it too personally....however like I said, can hurt like hell....yuck!


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Sarah_McDurham_50721
Posted

i don't believe that once a cheater always a cheater. i do, however, believe in honesty. that is being honest with yourself and whoever comes into your life. be it friend, friend with benefits, whatever.
three times cheating on you. honest, opinion and judging from other commentors. as well as my own experience. this chick ain't ready for a relationship, yet. and i might even add....it just might not be with you. i'm not putting you down personally. there just might be more that she's not telling you.
a very close friend of mine is constantly putting up with this on/off again relationship. cheating included. and from what my friend has told me about their relationship...it sounds like her on/off gf just ain't that into her.
would i accept a cheater. it depends on the relationship. i know my partner and i have been together almost 4yrs now. i know that we started our relationship with incredible honesty. i know that we've had far worse obstacles than cheating in our relationship history. i know trust that partner wouldn't ever do this, to me. but, if it should happen. i would do my best to forgive her. i do know that it would be very difficult for me. and she would have to seriously earn my trust and respect my processing system.

nevermind what anyone else says, though. this is inevitably your relationship. and each relationship is it's own. if you feel that you can emotionally or physically take the pain...then for own well being break it off.
ya put up with whatchya can handle. i always say


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Toni_Stewart
Posted

one person.... Communication is very effective... like for example... you would say to your Babe... when you do this and this... it makes me feel like this...and your mates may say baby i do this because this and this no disrespect to you or what we have...then you check yourself and decide honestly there isn't anything wrong with what he or she does... and then may decided to partake in it as well... and discovered the freedom and goodness it puts on your soul... and experience the goodness of truth your mate found in it.... free your mind...Monica... You have beauty inside... Meditate... I am a beautiful person... and have what it takes... for the goodness of happiness... and won't allowed an unproductive mind to block that... God Bless You....


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Jodie_Hendricks
Posted

Once a cheater always a cheater, There is no such thing as 3 strikes your out. Just One You're Done no excuses ever...............................


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Tina_Lyn
Posted

Agree Jodie....


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Monica_Allen
Posted

These are some really helpful tips from all of you! I broke up with her about a month ago and she keeps saying take her back, that she has changed, but I know VERY MUCH now not to put myself in that again because im not gonna get hurt again from someone that is not ready to be in a relationship and I keep reminding her that, that us being together is not happening, and she keeps saying she's not giving up. No matter what I have set my ground and will stand by it


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Tina_Lyn
Posted

Hang in there girl


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Jodie_Hendricks
Posted

Hang In There Monica.


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Dominique_Sullivan
Posted

My friend was a cheater she's cheated on my bestfriend from the beginning of the relationship because that's what she was what she did to protect herself from getting hurt, but she fell in love with my bestfriend and stopped cheating, but the damaged was already done and it was to late to take it back. So no a cheaters not always a cheated, but most of them are until they fine the person they want to be with the rest of there life. And even if you do stay with them you won't ever be able to fully trust them. So leave them and find someone who really cares for you, and loves you for you. n.n


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Monica_Allen
Posted

Thanks @Tina and Jodie im trying


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Latricia_Scott
Posted

Once a cheater always a cheater is not an accurate statement every cheater is different there are the ones that cheat because they look at it like a challenge there are the ones who kno who they want to be with but just aren't ready to be tied down you have the ones who know they can get what they want from you and still seek sexual pleasure from someone else and then you have the cheater has been hurt and doesn't know how to truly love and trust one person in the last case yes u should try because all they really need is to see that u truly care for them and cheating will no longer be a factor but if u think they cheat for all the other reason then leave no questions asked


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Posted

my opinion is once a cheater always cheater. Why give them another chance, they will do it again! Even if I was drunk and I have been and was propositioned I said no I have someone in my life. I would feel too guilty too and would not want my partner to do that to me so I would not do it to them.
If things are not working out then you talk about it but if you both have made a commitment to each other then it should mean you will be loyal to one another and not seek other people. Cheaters to me are not sincere and they are liars and I can't live with a liar.


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Maya_Zare
Posted

it depends on the person ! . Some people never can have that commitment in their relationships . Never and with no one !!!
there is absolutely no hope for this kind of people . and definitely you should move on ! ...

But i remember that in the beginning of my relationship i cheated couple times but she actually didnt find out except the last one !!

But right after i changed a lot !!! I mean i realized if i continue doing Crazy Stuff regardless to the reason of them i will gonna lose her forever !!! So i 100% Change myself , my life style and everything !!!!


Its funny that after 8 months she is acting like how was before !!! No iam so into our Relationship . i feel so committed to everything But she changed alot !!

at last , i should tell you that if anyone cheat on her Partner EVEN for One time . Things Might not work as Before !!!
Remember Women Forgive but Never Forget !!!


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Posted

excuse me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ONCE A CHEATER ALWAYS A CHEATER?! i believe thats a lil harsh.. i've expenenced the cheating life and well to be honest sense then i've never cheated on another women sense then cause i learned my lesson they will find out or you feel bad about it and come out with the truth.. i planed to keep both girls distance but small little world we live in?! so now im not friends with the both of them cause they started to date each other and one has called here and there but i can settle with them ever.. but yeah once a cheater can change to be honest with you.. cause i have so i've beaten the term thank you much


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Posted

I second dat...I know dat some people it's hard for it to sink in to their heads, but it's true once they cheat they will keep doing it no matter what...they have no feeling toward the other person..I've been there n I've removed myself from dat situation very quickly cuz i knew i deserved better that dat..It's an itch dat they need to scratch and when they do they will..


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Kelly_Aldi
Posted

I think when we say " Once a cheater always a cheater" we are referring to that same relationship... not that you have cheated and cant learn from the experience from. It is more than likely if you got away with it once your partner forgave you and chose to stay with you ... you will be more prone to do it again! People have cheated in their pasts and have seen the damage it can cause and have never done it again.. So I think its more on the same relationship thing.
Monica... you stay strong and keep your self respect..


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