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Samantha_Sayle

Ok need some advice - Love and Romance

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Samantha_Sayle
Posted

Ok long story short. I fell in love with this old friend of mine, she seemed to return the feeling untill i found out she slept with my male best friend, we all argued, they have now been going out for monts and she found out shes pregnent. He has been a twat and just fucked off to do drugs she ended up round mine about 2am last night,nothing happened between us. now shes braking up with him and wants be to be there once its done. Im just afraid of getting too close again and getting hurt.


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Samantha_Sayle
Posted

Sorry if that didnt make muc sense lol. But she wants me to be there and i wanna be there for her but im just afraid of getting too close and getting hurt again, im very emotional and get attached quickly if somone shows they like me. The whole baby thing dosnt bother me, i was actualy expecting it. But i promised id be there for her no matter what and im afraid of getting too close and hurt again :/. Im confused please help lol x


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Posted

I'm worried that you will be hurt you can be there as a friend, but what if he comes back into the picture, will she go off with him again? Take care and watch out, I think she's using you


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Samantha_Sayle
Posted

I know, im terible for giving second chances and putting my self in the posision to get hurt again. But i promised id be there for her no matter what and im not about to brake that promise. I will be talking to her about him, i have already told her a thousend times how much of a twat he is and i also kept telling her to use protection. I know its her fault but i feel slightly to blame for introducing her to my friends in the first place. If she wants him back in the picture i cant stop her.


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Posted

I usually do not comment on discussions, but I will make an exception. You have an obligation to yourself to keep toxic people out of your life. She has treated you badly in the past. She has betrayed your trust and slept with your friend, now she is pregnant. What else does this girl have to do to show you she doesnt love you. She has NO repsect for you or the relationship you once shared. This is not you burden, she is totally responsible for her mistakes. I know you are confused, but learn from your mistakes...She isn't worth your time!!! Take Care!


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Samantha_Sayle
Posted

She didnt brake up with him in the end so i dont have to get involved


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Meg_Mary
Posted

I agree with Marianne. Be careful!


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Posted

this whole problem has nothing to do with some promise you made to her a long time ago. She broke her promise to you by what she done. She is on her own now. You need to take care of yourself now. She pretty much made her bed. She is not a trustyworthy person and she will screw you over again. Preserve yourself and move on with your dignity intact. She did what she wanted and now she wants your help? I would say I had enough. Find a good woman to share some love.


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Posted

Well I see you got yourself in a pickle here girl cause your are wrapped up in this situation right now. Don't bad mouth this guy and even apologize for doing so as when and if he comes back and she goes back to him she will stab you in the back for bad mouthing him. I would try to distance yourself with her as much as possible. Never feel guility for making friends and introducing friends to each other. How did you know it was going to end up this way?
Your no mind reader for heavens sake. And this is her doing not hers.
Find out if she wants this baby and if not then maybe be a support to her but don't help her get out of it. She has to make that decision herself. If she wants it then she needs to make the father responsible too and they need to work things out even if they are not together anymore. She is in a terrible situation right now and just don't wrap yourself up in it too much as you will definitely get hurt. It's nice you want to be a friend to her again but be that, only a friend.
Help her think logically in this emotionally time and then tell her to think about it and then make a decision soon. In this day and age it is hard to survive as it is without bringing a baby who is not wanted. There are many adoption agencies that can help too so that baby can have a good future if she cannot give the child one.


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I agree with all that everyone said" it seems you are a good hearted person and i feel she maybe taking advantage of you, dnt feel you are obligated to her, i understand shes pregnant and all, steer clear of this one ,or they will run all over you heart and leave you behind...Just be a friend....
Dolores


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Jodie_Hendricks
Posted

Samantha,
You are way to good to her, in my opinion she made her choice when she slept with your male best friend. You have to take care of you. She just wants you to help her with the baby, your crazy if you do. I was with my ex for 26 yrs, she had 3 kids ,then we had a child together thanks to a freind, that ready made family will wear you out. You are a beautiful woman you need to be with someone who wants to be with you and only you. You Deserve that much


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Posted

you are so right Jodie. I think you hit that right on the nose. You know we all think the same thing, she needs you, not loves you. Find someone that will love you and not cheat or use you. WE want the best for you and have a great life fulll of love. Move on. She had her fun and you should too.


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Jodie_Hendricks
Posted

Amen Teri


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Posted

EXACTLY If she wasn't pregnant would she still be in your life now, NO, move on without her, you're better off without her, take care and keep in touch, don't let her use you anymore, she knows that's what she's doing, she doesn't really care about you or the baby, she just cares about HER


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Posted

Marianne has a good point there. But now that you have taken her in it will be harder to push her out. So tell her to make some hard decisions as I mentioned earlier about adoption, and other things I won't mention for her to think about. If she can afford to give that baby a good life then start preparing herself- with her work and make sure the baby is healthy.
She has to step up to the plate and start taking action in her life you can't do it for her. Your not her mother- but she is a mother now and needs to think completely different now.


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Posted

you're gonna get hurt, i wouldn't be friends with her, it only seems like she doesn't wanna drown without drowning someone else. i'd save yourself, you didn't put her in that hole, and when she figures out her shit, then you two can try the friend thing again. but that's my opinion.
just be safe, and don't do anything you know youll regret, trust your instincts, they'll tell you if you'll get burned or not.


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Posted

I think Brittany is right, but I think the friendship thing is lost. She had sunk everything when she did what she did. It is her loss and being around her will hurt and you will feel sorry for her and IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. you'll do things for her you shouldnt. Let her find some help for place that deal with those kinds of problems.Find someone to love you for you and that you can trust. It wont happen with her.


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I agree with what Teri said- It is not your fault- and like I said previously in one of my earlier posts just because you introduced her to this guy doesn't mean you are responsible for the irresponsible actions she took. You do deserve a better friend. It has been a week Samantha what has happened so far with this situation. Hope to hear from yu soon.


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Jodie_Hendricks
Posted

Samantha,
Your a beautiful woman. unless your saliva got your friend pregnant which we know didn't happen, then you need to walk away from her and never look back. She used you cause no friend would ever do that to another friend. Wash your hands of the whole thing, before her stupidity consumes you any further. We want the best for one another in this group, you are among friends.


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