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Deeper Complication - The Rainbow Lounge

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so i've described to you in my last discussion that i was beginning to feel interested in this guy who unfortunately for me is in an open relationship...last nite i was feeling down...& began to see that this might not work out...but after our movie date...he said things that reassurred me that everything will be ok...& that we might be getting deeper...& that might pose a problem...if i fall any deeper...i might have a hard crash with reality all the time...& i'll be pretty much on a roller coaster all the time...i'm not the clingy or jealous type...but with all of my past relationships...i'm used to being the only love...& well i'm a monogamous person...i'm pretty old-fashioned when it comes to love...that each person has their own soulmate...this guy has the looks & personality...& for some reason...he's been the 1st guy in forever to awaken such strong feelings...i'm so confused...i know what i want & i know he can't give me a monogamous relationship...so what am i doing???...so close yet so far...


then jony just let it run and see what happens, and make sure you dont end up getting hurt , i am sure that all your friends on here will give you any support they can, but never give in to despair, just go out and try and enjoy life's blessings, they are few and far between.


i really try not to give at times...i'm able to forget about everything...go back to my normal self...it's kinda hard to keep it up tho...i can't shake off this feeling that by the end of this month...either one of us is gonna sacrifice ourselves...or we're gonna have to sacrifice this love...at the end of the day...if i stay with him...i find it hard to be able to accept that my love alone is not enough for him...& i don't think i can live like that...but i'm willing to see this thru the month at least...just to give myself the satisfaction that i tried something new & i can then truly say that open relationships aren't for me at all...