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Amanda_Fischer

Confusion with a side of anger - The Rainbow Lounge

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Posted

Hey everyone, I have some problems. I have been wanting to join the military (Air Force) for a long while. Ever since Karen n I have been having issues, I thought about it and decided to do it. She does not like it and says her opinion like "good luck. There are enough dykes for you to enjoy." She says other things that make me mad and does it to piss me off. I tell her time after rime, I am going to protect my country and the people that I love. I am going into the reserves so I can come back and live somewhat a normal life. Karen asks about my "new" life and when I am going to leave. It hurts me to know that she is acting like this. Plus she says that we are only friends and when I changed my status before to single she was pissed. I am just confused and mad about the whole thing and do not know what to do.


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David_Kirkpatrick_61460
Posted

Just basing what I say on what I read in your posting, I would say, looking at things from your point of view, that there is not much you can do. It's not like you made a decision to join a convent: a move that would exclude Karen: I assume she is your lover or partner? She would still be part of your life: the military don't demand celibacy and bachelorhood of their members. It sounds more, from what I read in your posting, that you're dealing with a control problem in Karen. You've made a choice; Karen either has to accept a reasonable decision that makes you happy-- or she won't for her own reasons. As they say: the only way to know the solidity and soundness of a relationship is to test it to destruction--destruction of either the illusion of a relationship or the major doubts, which confront any relationship. Your relationship may be in the middle of that test.


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Michael_Wolfe
Posted

Amanda from one who is a Navy Vet and who loves his country I said do what you like to do and like you said your are not going to be gone long...and I do have to agree with David...I have been with my lover for 25 years now and we meet when he was in the navy...Things in life is a test and she is trying to test you...sit her down and try to let her know its not about being a dyke in the service it is about doing something for your country...

Good Luck in whatever you do.....


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Posted

Michael I have explained that to her numerous times and she just says the exact same thing. To have sex with the dykes or I'm going to get killed. We have been through tests before but not like this. She tells me that when I go, she may not be here when I come back. It is all hard because I am the one who always get hurt from her when I work on to better myself and for her. I hate being treated like garbage but how can I leave when I love her? I do not want to be home for 9 weeks and never speak to her again. I try to speak with her but she is always too busy. She will call when she wants because that I when she has time. I do not know.....


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Posted

Amanda, a person who loves you doesn't treat you or makes you feel like garbage. Your love may be one-sided. I think she may possibly want to control you instead of loving you. She doesn't want to make time for you. Many times we look past things b/c we see what we want to see instead of the reality of the situation. Joining the military, separating yourself from her for awhile will put things into perspective for you. If she loves you, she'll be there when you return and maybe she won't take you for granted anymore. If she's not around, then you have your answer. Either way you need to do this for yourself. You should value yourself a little more; love isn't suppose to make you feel bad and I'm sorry but this doesn't sound like a healthy relationship. I wish you the best.


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KAREN_WENDI
Posted

beforeu go on and on get the facts straight over her tyvm


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KAREN_WENDI
Posted

ss over here
this is not what it appears to be
tyvm
take care


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Posted

Karen, what you wrote doesn't make any sense at all.


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Michael_Wolfe
Posted

Amanda, I have to agree with Beatrice with ever thing she said..You need to do for you right now and if that is going to the military,then you need to do just that..Just one more thiing do you know what you want to do in the Air Force? I am just saying not everyonoe in the service sees war...I was a cook when I was in and was only on a ship for 6mo's before I found a good Capt and he move me to land duty....because of the way I cook...


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Posted

Do not wry about me anymore...... I'm done...... I am giving up...


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