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Posted

hey I'm a gay guy in BC (canada) and I'm almost 16, I'm the only out gay guy at my school. When did you guys come out, what i mean is what is the most common age ?? I feel lonely


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Gert_Bach
Posted

it have no time for the coming out u can say it with 13 or 16 or older
if u think u can better sleep in night and better live at day so come out
but if u are the only one and noone stand near u as a friend its a shit and bad feeling and i hope that ur family is with u at that time to
cos u need helping and good friends for that time
i know what i say here i have a same time with my coming out and i was in the middle of the twentieth for my coming out
hope u have nice time and many friend s for now


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Sawyer_Loiselle
Posted

Hey I am in BC too! I live in Shawnigan Lake. Anyway I am only out to my parents. Mostly my Mom. Most of my friends don't know except for a select few.


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Posted

Hi Ellis and guys,

I came out to my parents and close friends when I was 11 years old, before I had any sexual encounters. I recognized that I was different from some of my friends and was always more interested in sharing time with girlfriends and relating to them which I found almost impossible with boys.

Most of my gay friends now came out pre puberty.


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Jim_Bond
Posted

Actually, Ellis,and others, coming out depends on many factors. As Gert mentioned above, if you have no one else with whom you can share your feelings, then in that case, I would wait until I had more support. How does your town feel about gays in general? If it is against homosexuality, then your life would be hell and you wouldn't be able to either go to school or to work with an atmosphere against you. Being older than you, I came out in my twenties because, as I said above, the environment wasn't right for gays to live openly.
I the end, it is YOU who has to make the decision, but unless you are pushed into coming out, I would wait at least until the last year of high school. Good Luck with whatever you decide.


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Yeremiah_Hardt
Posted

Hey you're probably you're not the only one, but its hard to find out. Do things that interest you, you'll get friends, and maybe you'll find a bf.


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Posted

Congratulations on coming out early. I'm sorry that none of your peers has had the courage to come out as well. I hope you have some friends to support you.


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Jasie_Klebe
Posted

hey, so im ellis's bestfriend and he is VERY out. also, we live on a hippy-dippy little island and its basically run by gays.


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Jasie_Klebe
Posted

but hes the only out one at our school...


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Keith_Imeson
Posted

it,s important to honest with yourself and you will have feelings at your age and like both sexes thats not uncommon, just be happy and enjoy life. i,m still not out to everybody and i fill that hurt me in the long run, so i put alot of effort into my dirt biking and the gym workouts. i hope this helps. this site is great for getting out your feelings.keep in touch


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Posted

I have a fair number of friends thats not the problem haha


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Drew_Higgs_Bouson
Posted

Ellis I never came out at school I did to my folks when I was almost 15 but I live in a council estate, what you might call a sort of Projects, and the school was there so life would no have been good if I had. I don’t remember anybody coming out at school and there are very few who are out in the estate even now.

When I was 16 and at college I came out to some of my best friends, most were ok, others just sort of stopped being a mate. I am at Uni now (19) and I have an awesome BF (See Dean Hargreaves on here) and he has come out recently to his mates and his mum and his Gran know.

If you get him to chat with you (ok by me) he might tell you more but I can tell you he kept being gay a very big secret and he couldn’t talk to anybody about it. That meant older guys were able to abuse him and he had some real bad times but if he HAD been out, at least to his mum it might not have happened.

I guess what Im saying is that it just like depends on the guy and the circumstances and nobody can give you a yes or know answer mate. Still you have a great time, and where you live sounds awesome!!


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Posted

oh, yeah where I live is pretty awesome, there are a lot of out lesbiens in my school too! Thats crazy and I feel bad for your BF really to bad


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Sawyer_Loiselle
Posted

Sorry to hear.


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Drew_Higgs_Bouson
Posted

Hey don’t stress for him .He has made a lot of great progress over the last months. He is a totally awesome guy and I love him to bits actually.

His brain is amazing and his poetry can make me laugh or cry depending how he wants to write at the time.

Ellis you just enjoy life mate and make people laugh that is the greatest thing anybody can do for other people.


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gstanescu84
Posted

I came out at 25. Wasnt the best. But ever since I got rid of em, I've never been better.


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Posted

There isn't really a common age when people come out, everyone comes out when they're ready and at their own pace, I came out very slowly after being through a lot of denial in myself, I came out a few mates when I was 15 it must of been around May - June because we were coming up to our G.C.S.E's (They are exams we sit in the UK at the end of our school life) I came out to all my mates at around 16 and most left and came back others just stayed away - but that was good because I found out who my true mates are, that is actually one of the best parts about coming out you find who your TRUE mates actually are!
I came out fully to family, friends, everyone everywhere when I just turned 17.
All you should do is enjoy your life, your young you got a lot of amazing moments to come still! I can guarantee that!
Be happy and live your life for the now not the when and then.
Live the now!
Now, now, now, now, now!


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Tristram_Goncalves
Posted

Aint no correct age. I only came out by accident. I was waiting to be in a relationship where I would have to explain myself but no heavy duty relationship to explain away. Coming from Old World immigrant stock such news was not good news but my family took it well. I was in my late twenties with four children I was raising as a single dad, my family were more confused than made since I'd been with so many women earlier on, but they weren't terribly surprised at who my male lovers had been. I was also confused about the whole issue for a long time trying to figure it all out. I hadn't started being sexual with other boys till I was 14.


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Mel0730
Posted

I stopped hiding my sexuality and start disclosing the information that yeah, I'm gay, on the day of my 16th birthday. it isn't because it is the right age or something, it is because I feel ready. I'm tired of hiding and being uncomfortable on social settings.


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Connor_May
Posted

I came out to my parents when I was in the 7t grade. I was just 14 years old. I came out to everyone at school in the 18th grade at the age of 15.


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Posted

I always remember my ages of coming out to people, as it always came in 2's - I was 12 when I first began to acknowledge to myself that I was gay; 14 when I came out to parents (17 to the rest of the family) and 16 when I decided to come out to everyone and join my local LGBT group.

When I came out to parents, it was a tad shocking - rather that wait until "the right moment" to sit them down and speak calmly, I decided it was the right time to let them know one night when I was in the shower. My non-Practising-Catholic mother had called in to ask me to "Turn the heating off when [I] get out!", and I just blurted it out - "Mum, I'm gay.". Ofcourse, that led to a weird look and an interrogation thereafter, but things eventually calmed down and everyone was okay. :3

When I came out at 16, against parental advice not to tell anyone, I told friends and gradually let it grow from there. I got the most hassle from other "out" gays and lesbians, surprisingly, who said I "wasn't gay enough"/stereotypical. -_-' Regardless, aside from that, I was shocked by the general lack of response - I expected a massive kick-off about it! :P

Needless to say, as mentioned, shortly thereafter I ended up getting in contact with a local LGBT group and joined up - and, despite the small membership and lack of men of a similar age, I've not looked back since. :3


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Keith_Imeson
Posted

daniel i am very proud of someone like you i wish i had the balls to have come out like that i,m out to some but not to othersand it makes me mad at myself for being not totally out and proud.i applaud you


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