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Justin_Pascoe

Is a cheater always a cheater?? - Gay Guys! <3

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Posted

I like a guy, like, realy like him, he is a beautiful, sweet guy who wants to build a relationship with me. Problem is...he has a boy friend whom he says things are good! Twice now we have kissed..once was unexpected, the seccond, well...i wanted it as much as him. First question is: is the gay community full of untrustwothy guys who will cheat on you as quick as date you, and seccond question is if he would so easily cheat on his boyfriend, is he worth knowing...even as a friend. I need someone in my life who is...A) truswothy, B) loyal and C) who will last the test of time. I'm sooo sick of being used...I want to be LOVED!! Some opinions would help.


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Posted

you just haven't met the right one yet were not all that way! no if you want a guy who is all those things this isn't the one in my opinion but you need to decide if hes worth it! i hope this helps you somewhat take care!!


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Posted

good guys are rare to find...and i do believe that a cheater is always a cheater...but i also believe that if a guy really loves you and is committed to change...then maybe it's possible...but well as of your current relationship...he says things are good...i don't see how things can be good when you're trying to get at somebody on the side...i mean unless it's an open relationship...then i guess it's fine...but if it's supposed to be monogamous...then things aren't as good as he says...and that's pretty much double lying...cheating on his bf...and lying to you...but don't lose hope...love is meant for everyone...and i hope you find it...me and you are one of the few who actually look for a meaningful relationship...don't give up...you'll find your lucky guy...


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David_Kirkpatrick_61460
Posted

Well, Justin, it seems like you have analyzed the situation and answered your own question. You know what you want. You don't know if this guy is the right one for you. He was honest with you, though-- about having a boyfriend. If he wants to explore a relationship with you, well, at least you would be entering the situation with your eyes open. There's a saying: "Don't let fear make your decisions." I had a partner, who broke my heart.......but, I am a better person for having known him, and I can confirm the validity of another saying: "The best thing is to love and win-- the next best is to love and lose." You know what you want. I think you have the wisdom to handle this new journey into love if you decide to make it.......


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Tommy_Storey
Posted

Hi,there,Justin,

Finding, TRUST,in some one can some times be Vary
hard to find some times i the Gay world.

If you are not shure,then Testing is a possible way of
finding out for sture ??? lol xxx


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Kurt_Hanson
Posted

Hi Justin, My heart hurts for you. Those of us whom are looking for love and a relationship are easily used and hurt. I think we want it so much that we overlook things we know we shouldn't. If the guys in a relationship which he says he happy with but is willing to cheap, he may be beautiful on the outside but inside isn't so pretty. Chalk it up to another lesson learned and move on. Better luck next time.


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Posted

i agree with Kurt...as i said...he says things are good with his bf...meaning he has no intention of leaving him...but things not must be all that good if he has to be cheating...and it sounds like you want a monogamous relationship...clearly this guy doesn't believe in a monogamous long term relationship...so don't blind yourself or lower your standards just cuz you "want"him...no you don't...there are better guys out there...just go out and look...don't worry you'll find your guy...


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Posted

I suppose I feel bad as well, because I kissed him while he has a bf. I dont want to be "the other guy" to anyone...I suppose I just feel so lonely these days, Im looking for the first sign of love, in whatever form it takes, as it comes.


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Kurt_Hanson
Posted

I know Justin, been there!! Lonesome too and that can make us see with clouded vision. I'm trying to open myself to possibilities but being really hurt in the past makes me watch my step. I must add, I still maintain hope!!


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i think we all know the feeling...i even made the mistake of making out with a friend of mine who was also taken...but well it had to end...cuz it wasn't right...i wouldn't want my bf to do that to me...so there really isn't a reason why i should do that to somebody else...so after 3 times we backed off...i supposed to 1st two should've been enough...but as lame as this excuse sounds...the 3rd time it happened...i had to give in a little to get some answers out of my friend about what were his feelings...doesn't excuse what i did...and makes me feel bad...but at least it's over and it will never happen again...just keep looking...the right guy will come...you just gotta make sure it's him...and don't let no one fool you...


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Posted

Thanx for all your comments...they were really helpful and I feel a heap better. xoxoxo.


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Posted

Hii Justin,

First of all, ‘.....is the gay community full of untrustworthy guys who will cheat on you as quick as date you?’ is a bit of a sweeping statement. Sure, at times it feels as if this is the case, but there are no more cheaters in the gay community than there are in the straight one. Having said that, I do have to admit that there were times when I felt as you do. At the end of the day one has to sort out the truth from the lies, gay or straight, and in today’s times it seems to be a mammoth tasks. Just listen to politicians, watch the news, and even more so watch reality shows, where the word ‘reality’ doesn’t only have question marks behind it, but in front of it as well.

Unfortunately I have to admit that your question ‘.....if he would so easily cheat on his boyfriend, is he worth knowing...even as a friend?’ is a valid one. I do feel that, fall for a cheater; run the risk of being cheated on yourself.....eventually. Unfortunately, sexual attraction is more important to many, than having a mental or emotional connection. Being sexually attracted to someone only, in my experience precludes any chance for a relationship.

But hey, that’s just me. This guy could turn out to be your soul mate. You never know unless you try. I wish you well and hope it turns out to be great. Rest assured, there are a lot of good guys out there.

Luv & Light
Michael


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Posted

Hi ..Justin

I think the best way to solve it out is following your heart ..And make the right decision by your heart ..If i were you ,No matter how much i love him ,oR HOW much i fancy him ,I think maybe he is not the right guy for him ,The guy who really cares me ,and he would not hurt my heart ..so ......Make the right choice ...

Barney


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Posted

Sat., May 26th, 12, 11:30 Hrs. M.D.T.
Hi Group,
Interesting Topic/Comments.
I've Lived With a Roomie/BF for Close 25 Yrs. I Consider It a "Commonlaw Relationship" He Considers It Roomies etc. Guess Its Because I'm More Out Then He Is. Sure We Have Been Involved Sexually With Other Guys, But Not to
Often He is More of a Dominate Person/Top, so I Usually Do as Required Sexually or Run My Own Affairs but Knowing What Ever I Do a lot Based on What Someone Else Wants/Demands. Yes We are Involved Sexually, But Also
When Two People are Involved in Things Financially, or Both to Some Degree Dependent on Each Other for Things or What Ever, Its Really Whole Different Ball Game of Sorts.
No Two Relationships Between Guys are the Same. I Feel a Lot Has to Do
With Emotions, Finances, Personality etc. NOT Just Love - If Any, or the Need for Sexual Relief Between Two People.
Just a Few Views, Open to Discusion etc.
Tnx.,
Operater.


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Posted

Hii all,

I just think on the whole in this day and age, the description for ‘relationship’ has broadened somewhat. As they say, “If it ain’t broke, it don’t need fixin’.” So, if it works for you and you’re happy with the situation, that’s great. And don’t let anyone tell you differently :-)

Luv & Light
Michael


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Posted

Hii all,

I just think on the whole in this day and age, the description for ‘relationship’ has broadened somewhat. As they say, “If it ain’t broke, it don’t need fixin’.” So, if it works for you and you’re happy with the situation, that’s great. And don’t let anyone tell you differently :-)

Luv & Light
Michael


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Posted

yes if they cheat once they will do it time and time again remember a leopard cant change his spots


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Posted

But then again he's not a leopard. Soe people do grow up, and we all make mistakes. But if someone makes the same mistakes over and over again, I guess the learning curve is very big :-)


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Kurt_Hanson
Posted

Yes people do change but not very often. The question, who's going to get used while he's hopefully "changing". Also, who's heart is going to get broken? If you can fool around with someone who's is a "happy" relationship and not get emotionally involved and take it for what it is, go for it. Remember not to confuse a roll-in-the-hay with love.


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