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I have nothing to hide. This is me. - Get HAPPY

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Posted

I feel it's time to be honest and open with you. I will answer any and all questions you ask. In June 2001 one day before my birthday I was told I had leukemia. Chronic Myeloid Leukemia (C.M.L) I wa told I had 3-5 years to live. Then came the trial drugs I agreed to go on them. They made me very sick but they worked. Trial and trial I tried these drugs they got the count down but still no crue yet. So it's been over ten years now and I'm still here and I'm doing OK sure I have lots of side effects and down days so please forgive me if I have mood swings. I have a son and daughter, my son is 21 and has autisum he can not talk and needs one on one care. My daughter ir 18 and has just got her car licence and at last after what seems like forever for her a new job. I was married for 25 years but after all this stress my husband said he needed space and I really couldn't blame him. So here I am separated with two grown up kids who need me. When I was very sick I really couldn't do a lot so I started talking on the internet and I made friends. I met a beautiful girl called Renee' who also had leukemia she had a diffenert sort (the same as my father had) so I was drawn to herwe became very close. Before I knew it I was so in love with her and she was all I could think about. But she was very sick the last couple of years she just got worse and worse. Her best friend Jillian would keep my up-dated when Renee' could not get on-line. Last year Renee' spent most of her time in hospital as she grew weaker and weaker. Renee' past away in october. I still cry when I think of her and as I write this. Renee' was a wonderful poet and inspired me and others. Jillian and I have been there for each other we both loved Renee' so much. Now Jillian is planning move here later this year. So now you know everything about me. Feel free to ask anything. I am an open book. I am telling you this because I have always been a private person and I have always tried to please others. I am a mother and a carer. I love deeply and care too much so I have been told. I always put others before myself. Now you knew me and I want to get to know you. I have known pain and sadness and I have learnt ways to cope through it all. Every tear makes me stronger.


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Posted

Thanks for sharing. Some day I will open up also when the time is right. Blessings.


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Posted

Carol, i feel proud to have you as a friend. Just remember, "the sweet can never always be as sweet without the sour " . Youre one heck of a tough woman and i applaud you for that. I want to open up about my story but i am afraid.... to say the least. xoxo lavanya


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Grace_Solano
Posted

you are such an amazing and strong person carol....thanks for sharing your story, at least some people have the guts to start its nice to know your story here, such an inspiration i wish i can be as open book as you are and im sorry that im not..


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Posted

Carol, i shed a Tear here reading ur Story, and yeh WOW ur such a Strong Lady.. I am so sorry about Renee, but at least u got 2 be together and fall in love before she Passed on, and i am sure she Passed Happy having met u before she left.

Lot's of Love Carol

Richard


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Posted

Carol , I always have a habit reading out loud (to myself) .. The first time you told me ur condition , I have already admire you loads. I choked and cried when you mentioned Renee's part. She is now proud of you as she is blessing you wherever she is , she never left you Carol , She stays safe n remembered deeply in ur heart. And always will stay on ..

We love you too Carol ..


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Tommy_Storey
Posted

Yes,Carol.
I/we, want to thank you for sharing,this great loss in
your life,with us. As you say,Carol,with each tear shed,
you do get Stonger.

I now know why,you put such great feeling,into your Poetry.

Your Friend, Tommy, xxx


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Posted

carol your a brave and beautiful person and i'm glad your in my life xxxxxx


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Posted

well carol a sad story, and i understand the family life part, as i had same situation, and still do, and as far as mood swings go, know these too, E does that to me sometimes, and all believe me its differcult to control, can be a right bitch sometimes, usually i try and be nice and not insult my friends, and carol you have our support from all that made comment, they will help you in your groups.


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Posted

Hello Carol! I greatly admire your openess and candor. I also greatly admire and applaud you for choosing to push through and on to where you where you are today. Here you are among friends. "That which does not kills us, only makes us stronger". And thank you for sharing, it is inspirational for us struggling with our own stories.


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Dennis_Mix
Posted

Carol That was very well put and we are here for you. I know it is hard to deal with but my life was now as hard I have been Gay all my life. I became an Epileptic witch isn't as bad as what you have to deal with. My mother got sick in the 80's and I had to take care of her until she died in 98. I got a ab malformation
in my right temple lobe of the brain. I was ready ro give I met this girl from Canada and I told her about me and exceped me for what I was. We both had problems and the one I loved was on the road a lot. She came down to meet me and we got married and I had my brain sergery she got me through that. Although I am still gay she stayed right me.I know this is not anything like you went through so I let it go .

Alfawolf


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Posted

I was so nervous when I posted this, I have always been a very private person but I want everyone in the group to know me and I would love to talk to you too.
If you ever need someone to talk to I am here and I mean that. If you have any questions, I am here to answer them the best I can.
I love getting your messages and I love you all. I am a mum and I do mother and care so if you feel you need someone to talk to I'm here for you.


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David_Cloud
Posted

Massive support and appreciation for what you have done in this Discussion Carol. There are special people on this site who have taught me so much about being personally honest. I have opened my life to them privately and maybe in the future will be able to open my life to all as you have done. What you have done gives me great encouragement. Thanks so much.


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Dennis_Mix
Posted

I am glad we could help you Carol. That is what we are here for may God bless you and keep you Alfawolf


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Posted

Hey Carol, Will u be My Cyber MUM. ?


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Sarah_Keroack
Posted

Thank you for sharing your story, hope this finds you well Carol


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