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Zachary_Holmes

I'm falling out of love... Advice. - Gay Guys! <3

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Zachary_Holmes
Posted

Hello people,

So I've been with my boyfriend for a little over 4months and this is my first ever relationship and his first also... I fell for him quite quickly, after 2-3weeks, but I never fell deeper in love and I haven't over time... On the other hand, he has and still continues to do so.

I really don't believe he is the one for me but I do worry about him alot, he has a past of self harm and is quite over emotional, nearly everytime I'm with him he gets upset about nothing or small things and just stops speaking and won't tell me whats wrong. Its incredibly annoying but I put up with it and remain patient. I know I sound like a prick right now but, theres no major reason for him being like this yet I still have to deal with it everytime I see him and its causing me to not even look forward to those times together anymore. Its making me feel crap aswell, on top of this theres many other reasons over the last 4months that have lead to me believing I could only make this relationship last if i forced myself, which I'm almost doing now...

The only reason its lasted so long and why I need advice is because I can't end it. How much he loves me and how much he hates himself and how over emotional he is + a breakup = (i hate to imagine what would happen)...

What can I do? I can't change all the things about him that are causing me to not enjoy our relationship and no matter how I bring this subject up to him it'll hit him like a bus


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Posted

Interesting comments and feel your anger and disappointments. It may be hard to forget him, but time heals the wounds of the past. Just be patient, the right person will come along. Just don't jump into any situation. Take Care!


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Posted

No matter who you're with, you have to believe that he's THE ONE. Otherwise you're not only wasting his time, but also yours! If at any time one feels he's not the one, you seriously need to nip it in the bud. Breaking up is a traumatic experience, no matter what the situation, but you should waste neither of each other's time. Strength comes with truth, honesty and integrity.

May The Force be with you - Always!
Michael


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Posted

Break up with him. The more you prolong this, the more you,ll make his life a living hell. what is important here is your honesty and your true feelings. You have established tbat there is nothing in that heart for the poor dude. So give him a favor by letting him go with positive words. You cant lie to yourself and he cant live in lie.


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Phil_Lex_Archer
Posted

What's sad about this is the fact you say its both ur first time in a meaningful relationship and the stress of enduring the down limits is dampening the supposed excitement of true love, in the end it will make u feel like future reelatioins have this bad karma. So cut free and find a more healthier love. He will realise his faults asnd seek to cure this somehow, there is no point in two unhappy lovers.


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Neil_Hilde
Posted

Obviously, you need to break up with him. The best thing you could do for him is convince him to seek some form of counseling. There's depression issues, or some form of chemical imbalance that's going on with the guy that really does need to be addressed by a professional.

I can honestly say that the best, not to mention only, thing my ex ever did for me was drop me off at the local mental ward. Of course, if he had actually paid any real attention to me I wouldn't have needed to go in. Beside the point though! A good depression med can often be the one thing to get a person back to "normal".


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Zachary_Holmes
Posted

Thanks for the advice guys, I'm going to talk to him about how unhappy I am and see if we can fix things, I haven't done this yet because I'm afraid of hurting him or making him even worse. You've helped alot!!


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Posted

Good for u Zachary, Here's all the best of Irish Luck for Ya. I hope all work's out for ye


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Phil_Lex_Archer
Posted

Glad we cud all help Zac,yes it will be scary to have dat chat, but for ur sakes both, u know it has to be done. If a violent res[ponse cud be in the offering seek to have a third party present if need be. Good luck mate and chin up


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