Jump to content
Chud

Dark place... (Part II) - Gay Guys! <3

Recommended Posts

Posted

Woke up this morning Sunday 4th December 2011, feeling as rough as a Badgers ass!
I think I've got a cold mixed in with some sort of Chest Infection, when I'm ill I tend to over think things and tend to depress myself, which is what I done today, the things I thought really hurt...
I thought about my ex boyfriend and realising I love him more than I actually knew I did, and the things I said to myself brought me down, I said this 'There'll be someone else who'll have those cuddles, someone else who'll have those kisses, someone else who'll have those hugs, someone else who'll share those moments, someone else who'll enjoy his company, someone else who'll have the honour of his love, and that someone cannot be me...'

Another problem I have is that I feel as if this breakup has affected me so badly that I feel as a person I have changed, my personality has changed, me, myself as a person have changed, the way I feel about myself and others has changed drastically!! I need to find the new me before I do anything, but with the way I feel at the moment finding the new me is impossible, I need a way out of this dark place but I cannot find it, there's no light, what the hell can I do?


Share this post


Link to post
Heebie999
Posted

Every event in your life changes you.
The more profound the event.. the more profound the change.
The first thing you need to do is persevere.
The next thing you need to do is try & change your routine a bit.. try & shake yourself out of this funk.
If that doesn't work.. seek professional help. (I recommend psychologists over psychiatrists, and anyone at all over social workers.)


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

totally agree with todd about social workers, and richard we all know how you feel, and if feel the need email we talk privately, look after your health, and allways remember there is light at the end of the tunnel.
also talking with the guys on here seems to have helped you, your post shows a more positive outlook already, than how depressed you were last week.


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

know how u feel,,ive pleurisey on top of my heart probs,,been in hospital couple of days..if its quite new the depression,,yes a phsychologist cud help,,if its old n been there deep n hidden away like myself,,its goin 2b very difficult..positivetity isnt always easy to find,,after my 9 MIs n 2 failed bypases,,im reallt struggling..my home needs underpinning,,as i bort it from a cowboy buider and this wek,,i had to have my prescous pet cat put to sleep cos of liver n kidney failure..i know i not the right person to talk to ,,but i empathsize with u,tc x


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

First of all, you need to take care of yourself, and not let yourself become any worse.


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

@ andrew f, its been a while since we talked, sorry to hear about the cat and your other probs,hope you get everything sorted out.
@mark, good to hear your feeling better, and you have made a good point.
I am sure that with time,everything that richard is feeling right now will pass, time heals a lot of emotions, and it takes time to heal.


Share this post


Link to post
Dave_Mack
Posted

Richard as I see it you are on your pity pot. You have had a few days to process what happened. If I may off this thought, it's time to move on. Put him in the rear view mirror and find another. At your age there are many fish in the sea, Cast out your line and reel one in. You may find one that is so much better that you will ask yourself what you say in this one in the first place...


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

@allan ros,,no my heart disease is incurable,,but other things can b fixed maybe..but finding money a builder insurance for my home is difficult,,the pleurisey is takin its time..but thanx x


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

andrew we have talked often, and i know you have incurable heart disease,you have my sympathy, and further problems are aggravating the situation, and anytime you want come on here and chat with everyone, we support each other.


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

Hi richard, All this has 2 do with is your Thinking, When u wake in the Morning u have 2 try and think positive, and u will be Amazed, If u wake up thinking of ur ex and what he is doing and who he is with, well then u go further into the Dark Place in ur Head. Your head will play all kind's of bad stuff with u, But u can Change that and Fight Back and think Positive. It's hard at the moment cause ur Heart is Broken, but i can Gurantee u that not 2 far in the Future u will meet someone and u will wonder what all the fuss was about. Most of us on this site have been there and found even Better Happyness.


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

good comment richard from the new mrs ross
heh heh


Share this post


Link to post
Homer_Bozarth
Posted

dont get depressed Richard, i am here if you need to unl;oad. i am a good listener


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

You should all be helping Richard Davies. He is a great guy, the sort that the words "True Friend" were invented for. He has had a lot of troubles and is real down right now, but he still got time to try to help other people. He is awesome and really worth helping so help him please. Don't waste time with me, help Richard to be happy again.


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

sorry dean but both of you need our support right now, and we freely give time and effort to help both of you.
To all of us your both important, end of story.
glad to see you online today, why dont you chat to richard privately via email, i am sure the 2 of you have a lot to discuss.
It would be good for both of you.


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

I have sent him two private messages, before I posted this. ANyway I think he got enough probs of his own and is feeling real down, so he won't want to have me go on about how I feel and stuff, he needs cheering up not made to feel worse.


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

dean i know that, but both of you are important to me, your both young guys and can share stuff , that sometimes talking with an older guy you keep to yourselves. both of you keep in touch with all of us on here.


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

Tanx Allan, Richard know's we are all here for him. I did send him a private message and i got a Lovely reply, yeh Richard Davies is one wonderful chap. As for Young Dean here, i tried as well but i dont think he want's 2 know ( sorry dean ). Maybe i was the wrong person 2 be chatting with dean,ah well, But i will sleep at nite and say a Prayer for all the guy's who are going through a Rough Time on this site.


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

richard, its not your fault, and dont feel depressed, we all want to help both of them feel better, dean just doesn't want to hog all the sympathy, andrew f, also needs people to talk to as well, even me, you all have no idea how much you have helped me, well richard ivers has, and 1 or 2 others, some of my other friends on here are in hosp this wk, and are in my thoughts & prayers.


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

its lifes experiences richard..life is full of ups n downsmbreakups....its not such a nice world at times..breakups r nvr easy to deal with,,even after all my years,,i put people now at a distance cos they cud hurt me,,say things n promise things,say they love u,,only for that moment in time it seams..guys cant deal with mt ilness,,but i put up with loads of their probs,,no wonder im at a point were i dont trust guys or people..i end up stuck @home,,cos i cant do alot of day2day things,that i once cud only a few yrs ago.my best frend died in 08..i wish i cud say something positive n help..but lately,,well all this year ive not been able to help myself,,my thorts r with u my young man,,hugz x


Share this post


Link to post
Dennis_Mix
Posted

My thoughts are with both of you guys. I am not complaining but I do have an idea of how things are going so. I want to say I had heart atc. and just had a stroke. I don't look for sympathy I just say I have these things so you know I am caring about you two. Please do try to get a smile on snd we can be happy.

Alfawolf


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

Sorry 2 hear that Dennis ><


Share this post


Link to post
Dennis_Mix
Posted

As I say I deal with it and just have to slow down. I do have my computer to keep me company


Share this post


Link to post
Ben_Richard
Posted

awwww! u all are really awesome, a guy could nvr ask 4 better friends than y'all. ur words of support & comfort r all so touching! is times like this that i really appreciate my joining of this site. Richard i can only imagine how u feel but u hv 2 try & beat this. sometimes we spend 2 much time thinking abt or focusing on what we've lost that we don't create chance 4 a better 1 to come our way. Pls open ur heart for some1 new 2 come in & mk u happy again.


Share this post


Link to post
Posted

dennis ive had 9 heart attacks since i was 23,,n in my mid 40s now,,two failed bypases,,which have caused more probs plus 9 pacemakers since 1999,,ive lost the will to just smile,,ive pleurisey at mo..i ve lost out alot on life,,i was okish till 2nd bypass,,but the surgeon did the surgery wrong..n it failed within weeks..sorry i cannot just pickup a smile n feel happy again....


Share this post


Link to post
Ben_Richard
Posted

To Andrew F, Dean, Dennis & every1 that's going thru stuffs right now be it medical, emotional etc my tots r wit u. may u all find the strenght u need to overcome those situations.


Share this post


Link to post

×