Gays.com writer Calvin slips on his Manolo Blahniks to go all Carrie Bradshaw. He wants to know: how do you know when you’ve found the love of your life?


After being single for ages, I’m starting to wonder if I’ll ever meet Mr. Right, or if such a concept actually exists. Trying to find that perfect mix of mental connection, a similar sense of humor, compatibility and sexual attraction in a partner seems to be my own 'Mission Impossible'.

Gay-MrRight.jpg.jpg

Boyfriends have come and gone, but so far none have managed to tick all the boxes (or manage to keep them ticked). I’ve met some fantastic guys, had great relationships and think I’ve come pretty close to finding Mr. Right… but they’ve always turned into Mr. Not Quite Right. For example, the guy I did everything with – we had the same passions and outlook, a mutual sense of humor, I can’t recall a single full-on argument (well, apart from when we were breaking up). I felt ‘at home’ with them and seeing them from afar left my heart aflutter. But sexually, we weren’t on the same wavelength and didn’t have much success in resolving that. The physical connection between us wasn’t strong enough. And the possibility of an open relationship in trying to make it work wasn’t an option.

It seemed such a shame to lose such a nurturing and fulfilling relationship because of sex alone; I’m sure you’d agree that the physical connection is important but, at the same time, it isn’t everything… so when does it become a relationship-breaker? If you manage to find real love and affection with someone, you should do whatever you can to make it work.

Nowadays, especially in our internet age, it’s a cinch to meet someone to have a great shag with, but it’s nigh on impossible to find a person that you can have a deep mental and spiritual connection with. So when you find that special someone, you should do all you can to make it work.

I’ve had friends in the past come out of long-term relationships because of a diminished sex life and then pine endlessly for their ex, chewing my ear over whether they’ve made a huge mistake or not. Likewise, I’ve know those that had a great relationship between the sheets, but we’re screaming and shouting at each other half the times as they were just not compatible personality-wise.

So, the Carrie questions are: can we really have it all? Can someone tick all the boxes? Can we be too fussy looking for a partner? What do you look for in a partner? How do you actually know when you’ve met the right person? I’d love to know what you think! 

 


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Guest

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Afterb been into a series.of.different relationships, I realised that sometime we can't have all our boxes.ticked. this is.cause while.you are.ticking your.box, the other person may be.ticking his too. We all have to accept.each other's differences.I.order.to make it work . You decide your own Mr right . Not waiting for Mr right. My nd has the flaws that I really hated in the beginning, but.for one thing he taught me to sometimes accept things as it is . He taught me patience and.also tolerance,. The only.important.thing that really matters time now is his honesty , truthfulness and.faithful in this relationships. Wet not both working hard for.our future. Well of.course sometimes I have to fulfill his fantasies.too.

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nickelby

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Well, for myself a relationship is not 50/50. Its 100/100. You should give it in all honesty your very best. Also, its give and take. It cannot be one sided in regards to what you want - it should be what do we want. Once you change your thoughts of "me" to "us", you will notice that a happy relationship is very much possible. Respect, Love Trust,, Empathy, and Dedication are also key factors. If you have these five things included in your relationship, then when things get difficult due to circumstances, you will overcome them alot easier and more peaceful. It worked well for me and my fiance for the 5 years we were together (but alas he started a new adventure in a place I could not follow) and we were so very strong together and unseperable. We talked openly about anything and everything - that to me was a relationship of pure love. Will I find it again? You betcha! Because I know that it does exist, their are men out there that have it...... hard to find, but they are out there.

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Guest

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40 years on my partner and I are coming to the conclusion we found our Mr Rights.

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Guest

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Well who is Mr right? I found mine 15 years ago and we just love each otherenough to overcome the things there has been send to try us. We don't argue yell or scream just talk about things when needed. And we meet on the net countries apart. It took one year before we actually were able to meet up in person. Yes I Have Mr Right and I hope other have the patience to work it out. A relationship is something u always work on. Ask yourself what can I do today to make my partner happy. I do. Love to all of u.

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Guest

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well me and my man have been together 5 years and married for two of them we are complete opposites we hardly have anything in conman sex is great there is a Mr right out there just not what or who you expect him to be I mean my man isn't even my type he is messy unorganized and yet we love each other and could not be without each other

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Guest

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A relationship is hard work, you'll never find anyone who can live up to all your demands... and after-all it's also not a copy of yourself you want to have a relationship with. See the differences as something good, and learn to live with them... only that way can you have a strong and lasting relationship...

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Andy102

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"It's so hard to meet someone that has EVERYTHING, so sometimes you just gotta compromise!" That is so true, personally to me, you can't have all of the cake and eat it to. Some one gotta give to make the relationship work because to me if I had some one who I have everything in common whats the point in that (Boring) I can bring something to the table that he might never experience and that goes with me. Like if you've never done sky diving try it with your date who has gone sky diving before. Surprise that someone special and vice versa. That's just me. What about you? What do you think?

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Guest

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It's so hard to meet someone that has EVERYTHING, so sometimes you just gotta compromise! :)

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